Every Day In May - Day Twelve

Wow. Today was a pretty shitty day. I'm glad it's over and I'm just about to climb into bed to be with my stack o' comics.

I had an appointment with my doctor today. Actually, it was with the physician assistant. Got the results of my blood work. I've posted here before about my cholesterol being slightly out of whack. I've been working really hard to bring the number back to where it should be. Normal cholesterol should be 200 or below. Mine was 210. Not too much out of whack, but enough that it's above where it needs to be. The doctor put me on Niaspan to help bring my numbers down. I've also been taking an Omega 3 supplement. On top of all that, I added daily oatmeal into my diet. You've seen the commercials. Eat oatmeal for 30 days and your cholesterol will drop. So for three months I've been eating it, missing only two days (though one was after I went and had the blood drawn, so that doesn't count.)

I get to the doctor's office five minutes before my appointment. It was at 8, the time the office opens. I check in and sit. In the meantime, five people who have all come in after me get seen by their doctors. And I sat. For 30 minutes. Nothing like that to piss me off first thing in the morning. I get in to see the PA and he gives me my results. My cholesterol has climbed 9 more points. WTF? He says it's nothing to worry about. I'm very healthy otherwise. My heart sounds fantastic, my blood pressure is amazing (it was 90 / 70 which scared the crap out of me, but he assured me it was great), my weight loss is continuing. But I still feel like shit. I felt like I studied all weekend for a test only to fail it. And that's when the old Walter came out. I moped around all day. I stuffed my face with cookies (and not just any cookies, but Fudge Fancies. They're about the size of a half dollar and they have 130 calories each.) We went out to dinner tonight and even though I wasn't hungry, I stuffed myself. I felt defeated and this is how it came out. Is it any wonder I was 300 pounds? I'm trying to tell that Walter to go fuck off and not to come back. I hope it works.

At work today I had two things that irritated me. First, the new guy. He was near my desk doing some filing. I happened to turn around while he was bent over only to get a good view of his ass crack. And not just the tip. I bet he was showing about 3 inches. And then shortly after that, some asshole decided that they needed to reapply their perfume. By the gallon. And it was a scent that I'm allergic to. My right eye instantly dried up and turned red and itchy. My left eye did, too, but not as bad. This is after a reminder email was sent out last week to be aware that this isn't acceptible because people do have allergies. Whatever.

After dinner tonight I was feeling guilty about loading up with food. I took a power walk and started feeling a little better about myself. Now it's about 8:30 and I'm going to sign off the computer, climb into bed, try to figure out how Parvati beat Amanda at last night's Survivor finale and then read some comics.

Tomorrow is going to be a better day.