The Johari Window was invented by Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingham in the 1950s as a model for mapping personality awareness. By describing yourself from a fixed list of adjectives, then asking your friends and colleagues to describe you from the same list, a grid of overlap and difference can be built up.
So I was curious as to what my Johari window would look like. I thought it would be a fun exercise to see how the way I see myself differs from the way others see me. I posted links all over the place to drum up attention. All in all, I got 28 people to contribute to my experiment. Some I know in real life, some I know online, some I know from the podcast. People from different parts of my life.
The window is broken down into four panes. In Arena are words I used to describe myself that others also chose. In Facade, these are words I chose that no one else did. In Blind Spot, these are words others chose to describe me that I didn't also choose. And finally, in Unknown, these are words that no one picked.
Arena(known to self and others) dependable, introverted, nervous, quiet, self-conscious, shy | Blind Spot(known only to others) accepting, bold, calm, caring, cheerful, clever, complex, energetic, extroverted, friendly, giving, happy, helpful, idealistic, ingenious, intelligent, kind, logical, loving, modest, observant, powerful, proud, reflective, searching, sentimental, silly, spontaneous, tense, trustworthy, warm, wise, witty |
Façade(known only to self)
| Unknown(known to nobody) able, adaptable, brave, confident, dignified, independent, knowledgeable, mature, organised, patient, relaxed, religious, responsive, self-assertive, sensible, sympathetic |
All Percentages
able (0%) accepting (7%) adaptable (0%) bold (3%) brave (0%) calm (3%) caring (25%) cheerful (10%) clever (17%) complex (10%) confident (0%) dependable (3%) dignified (0%) energetic (3%) extroverted (14%) friendly (28%) giving (14%) happy (7%) helpful (3%) idealistic (3%) independent (0%) ingenious (3%) intelligent (35%) introverted (25%) kind (21%) knowledgeable (0%) logical (3%) loving (17%) mature (0%) modest (14%) nervous (21%) observant (10%) organised (0%) patient (0%) powerful (3%) proud (3%) quiet (14%) reflective (10%) relaxed (0%) religious (0%) responsive (0%) searching (3%) self-assertive (0%) self-conscious (21%) sensible (0%) sentimental (10%) shy (32%) silly (46%) spontaneous (7%) sympathetic (0%) tense (10%) trustworthy (17%) warm (10%) wise (7%) witty (50%)
You can make your own Johari Window, or view PussPatrell's full data.
Let's start with Arena.
dependable, introverted, nervous, quiet, self-conscious, shy
These are the six words I felt best described me. See a theme here? Most aren't the most self-assured words I could pick, huh? But there must be some truth in here because others used the exact same words to describe me. This is how I see myself. I view myself as a wallflower. I get incredibly nervous around people and situations that I'm not intimately familiar with. I tend to be very quiet until I'm comfortable. However, I think I'm a dependable person. People who agreed with me on these traits seemed to find me shy more than anything else, followed by introverted and then nervous and self-conscious. It's comforting to see that I'm not seeing things in myself that others don't see.
dependable (3%) introverted (25%) nervous (21%) quiet (14%) self-conscious (21%) shy (32%)
No point in examining Facade. That box is empty.
Blind Spot is next. These are traits that others see in me that I don't. Well, that's not entirely true. I could only pick six words. I do see some of these things in me, they just didn't make the top six.
accepting, bold, calm, caring, cheerful, clever, complex, energetic, extroverted, friendly, giving, happy, helpful, idealistic, ingenious, intelligent, kind, logical, loving, modest, observant, powerful, proud, reflective, searching, sentimental, silly, spontaneous, tense, trustworthy, warm, wise, witty
Some of these are think were very good picks, while others make me wonder. Extroverted? Well, I guess I can get that way, but I don't think it happens all too often. When I'm feeling comfortable and safe, but as a rule, not so much. Observant? My husband will be the first in line to disagree with that. It's usually two or three days after he gets his hair cut before I notice something is different. And it drives him so far up the wall.... Powerful? I'm not even sure how to translate that into a personality trait of mine. Powerful in what way?
On the flip side, I am extremely sentimental. Sometimes I think a little too sentimental. I can be cold as steel and then I'll find an old letter or something and will be sobbing. I think I'm very idealistic. I'm certainly reflective and absolutely searching.
These are the most commonly chosen traits:
caring (25%) clever (17%) friendly (28%) intelligent (35%) kind (21%) loving (17%) silly (46%) trustworthy (17%) witty (50%)
I mostly agree with them. I'm very surprised to see half the respondents pick witty to describe me. I must be wittier than I think. While I think I can come up with a good one liner every once in a while, I'm always hard on myself for not being quicker. I can think of a million funny things to say hours later. Silly was next and I definitely have my moments. I probably have a lot more than I'm willing to admit, though if I think of the workplace Walt, I think silly describes me to a tee. I am definitely in total agreement with loving. I love hard. (And that sounds dirty.)
The final window was Unknown. These are words no one chose. My unknowns are:
able, adaptable, brave, confident, dignified, independent, knowledgeable, mature, organised, patient, relaxed, religious, responsive, self-assertive, sensible, sympathetic
I understand why most of these were not chosen. Of these, though, I think that able, sensible and knowledgeable fit me.
The Johari Window is interesting in the fact that the words you have to pick from are, for the most part, positive words. There's a sister to this called the Nohari Window. Same thing, only the words you get to pick from are negatively slanted. I asked people to participate in that one, too, but I only got 7 people to fill that out. I don't think 7 is enough to get a good enough idea of me. These are the results I have so far.
Arena(known to self and others) timid, insecure, selfish, impatient, passive | Blind Spot(known only to others) aloof, lethargic, withdrawn, needy, irrational, childish, embarrassed, panicky, insensitive, smug, overdramatic |
Façade(known only to self) inflexible | Unknown(known to nobody) incompetent, intolerant, cowardly, violent, glum, stupid, simple, irresponsible, vulgar, hostile, unhappy, unhelpful, cynical, unimaginative, inane, brash, cruel, ignorant, distant, boastful, blasé, imperceptive, chaotic, weak, loud, vacuous, unethical, self-satisfied, rash, dispassionate, dull, predictable, callous, inattentive, unreliable, cold, foolish, humourless |
Dominant Traits
57% of people agree that PussPatrell is timid
71% of people agree that PussPatrell is insecure
All Percentages
incompetent (0%) intolerant (0%) inflexible (0%) timid (57%) cowardly (0%) violent (0%) aloof (14%) glum (0%) stupid (0%) simple (0%) insecure (71%) irresponsible (0%) vulgar (0%) lethargic (14%) withdrawn (28%) hostile (0%) selfish (28%) unhappy (0%) unhelpful (0%) cynical (0%) needy (28%) unimaginative (0%) inane (0%) brash (0%) cruel (0%) ignorant (0%) irrational (28%) distant (0%) childish (14%) boastful (0%) blasé (0%) imperceptive (0%) chaotic (0%) impatient (28%) weak (0%) embarrassed (42%) loud (0%) vacuous (0%) panicky (42%) unethical (0%) insensitive (14%) self-satisfied (0%) passive (42%) smug (14%) rash (0%) dispassionate (0%) overdramatic (28%) dull (0%) predictable (0%) callous (0%) inattentive (0%) unreliable (0%) cold (0%) foolish (0%) humourless (0%)
You can make your own Nohari Window, or view PussPatrell's full data.
It's been hard to get people to fill this one out for me. Most of the responses have been that they think it's too mean spirited. I can understand why they'd think that, and if it was just this one survey, I would agree, too. But as the flipside of the Johari Window, it makes perfect sense. Everyone has good traits and bad traits. If you're looking for a complete picture of the way you're perceived, you need it from both ends.
Because of the small response, there's not much to comment on. The only thing that surprised me is smug. I don't see that in me, but that doesn't mean it's not true. In this case, I wish I had an example or two pointed out to me. Otherwise, I tend to agree to varying degrees about the other words.
If you're interested in doing your own Johari Window or Nohari Window, here are the links:
1 comment:
People find you smug? Really? I guess I didn't ever see that side of you. The "negative" one is hard to do when you genuinely care about someone. You don't want to hurt their feelings, but at the same time, youre doing a pal a favor by being honest.
I think every single one of us holds a little of each of the words on the good side and bad. I think it's just a matter of how we portray ourselves and how we treat others.
Regardless of the "bad" words, people really adore you for the good ones and you are a good person and that's all that matters.
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