11.02.2009

Support

I try to be a supportive partner to Ken. I really do. I know I have my own issues and I tend to be more self-centered than I should be, but I really do try to be there to support him in whatever he does. Dieting is something I really try to support him in, but it's hard. It's really hard. He's been on just about every single diet plan out there at one point or another and it's rare if he goes more than a week or two before quitting. The Atkins Diet was very successful for him. He lost a lot of weight with that one, but one day he stopped and never looked back. All his weight came back. He had some success with the South Beach Diet, but again, the second he stopped, it was over. Right now he's on Weight Watchers. This is week three and it's been a very bumpy road so far. He couldn't find the building where his meetings were on the first day. He ended up finding an alternate location and did pretty good the first few days. Last week, not so much. Today, in fact, was restart day. Part of refocusing for him was deciding that in order to succeed, he needed to start cooking dinners. We are terrible about cooking. Just terrible. Right now, I cook dinner for us once a week, usually Sunday nights. I didn't last night because he wasn't hungry and I wasn't going to cook for just me.

Anyway, tonight he started cooking. Since he doesn't really know how to cook, his plan is to pick someone from work, quiz them about what they made for dinner the night before and make that. Tonight he made flounder, asparagus and sweet potatoes. I have to say, he did a great job. It was delicious. I'm really proud of him for doing this. It's definitely a much healthier meal than he would have had. Only problem is I'm sitting here feeling like crap. I felt it was important to sit down and eat with him, but I now feel like I weigh 800 lbs. I'm not used to having a big dinner during the week. I usually grab something small to eat as I generally eat a larger lunch at work. Because I didn't know of his plan until minutes before leaving work, I couldn't cut down on my ginormous salad this afternoon in preparation. So I'm sitting here feeling very bloated. I told him that I don't know if I'm going to be able to do this again tomorrow night. He was fine with it, but he was going to cook anyway. I'm welcome to eat as much or as little of what he makes as I want. And I will have something, just not as much as I ate tonight. That last thing I want to do is derail my own diet in support of his. I know it sounds a little selfish, but I don't mean it to. We'll find a nice compromise there somewhere and hopefully it will help him on the road to dropping the weight he needs to. I just don't want him to give up. My fear is me not eating what he cooks for dinner as being the excuse for the failure.

5 comments:

(F)redddy said...

That was very sweet of Ken, and you. Perhaps y'all can agree in advance on the weekends of 2 or 3 meals a week that you'll be eating together in the evening so you can plan in advance what to eat for lunch? That way it's a win-win-win. Congrats to Ken for trying, and congrats to you for supporting his efforts.

Joe in Philly said...

If he's going to cook a lot of food then he should make things that you can have as leftovers, perhaps as your lunch the next day. Don't eat huge portions just because there's a lot of food cooked.

MattyMalone said...

Ok, first I agree with Joe in Philly-it's all about portions. What he made is obviously pretty healthy, and you should be eating something-so why not some of his healthy dinner? You shouldn't be consuming all your calories by noon, mister. Skipping a meal is the best way to make sure your metabolism slows. This is going to sound like a broken record of Holly's, but perhaps you both should try Livestrong? It made the difference for me. Love and Kisses to you both-and tell him to call me-we can talk about stuff from "in the trenches" I still have a long way to go, too.

Bjorn said...

I find it easier to plan a meal that can be reheated for another meal. always getting more food that just one is sometimes better.

you can do it. I mean if Phreddy can lose weight anyone but me can.

(F)reddy said...

Hateful.