Foul

It's Saturday afternoon. I'm not at work, the house is quiet. I should really be in a good mood. But I'm not. I'm in a rather foul mood. This week has just been a bear and it's beaten me into the ground. Reasons?

(A) I think all the overtime I've been doing is really taking it's toll. I tried to get some more in this week and managed to stay 1/2 hour one night and an hour one other. Both killed me. I may have mentioned this before, but I work a 37 1/2 hour week. So if I chose to do overtime, the first 2 1/2 hours each week is comp time. My work week runs Thursday through Wednesday, so Thursdays I try to get as much of my 2 1/2 hours in as possible. That's the night I got in an hour. I'll try to motivate next week to get the other hour and a half.

(B) Friday night is my night to go out with Ken to our favorite restaurant. We do it every week. This week, when Ken picked me up, he told me our friend Carol was meeting us there. No big whoop. But when we get there, Carol says she invited a friend. Now I'm getting annoyed. I've had a crappy ass week and I'm not in the mood for new people. Just don't care to deal. So we wait for her friend. And wait. And wait. Finally, Carol calls her and finds out she's en route. And she's invited someone. Now I'm really getting pissed off. I don't like deviating much from my usual patterns. Friday nights are dinner at MJ's with Ken. Now I'm meeting two new people, and I've been moved from my table once already because there isn't enough room. And now I'm forced to wait. Once her friend arrives, we are still waiting. I know I'm probably sounding like an irrational child, and I'll admit to some irrationality. Sure. But I like what I like the way that I like it. I was so irritated that when we got home, I ate a pudding cup. And half a tub of Cool Whip.

(C) Tonight we're going out to dinner with a work friend of Ken's and his partner. I was already on edge about this before Friday night even happened. To restate, I don't really like new people. I'm rather shy when I don't know people and it takes me a little bit to warm up to people. I understand that I need to be in these situations to get to know people, but it doesn't mean I have to like it. I am positive all my years in retail have made me the way I am. I was forced to talk to the unwashed masses every day, all day, so when it came to my own personal time, I started shutting the world out. It's where I'm comfortable and where I thrive. I know I need to get out more, that I'm going to become a complete hermit with nineteen cats. I don't want that either.

(D) Don't ever go grocery shopping on a Saturday morning. People don't fucking move. I went this morning to get it over with. I'm trying to get chores done so I can relax tomorrow. I usually like to go grocery shopping later at night, when the store is quieter.

(E) I really pissed one of my co-workers off and I feel bad about that. On Friday we were joking around and I said something that he took the completely wrong way and blew up. If that was the effect I was going for, I'd be thrilled, but he was really, really pissed. He went off on his boss and left early because he was that pissed. Sure, he's got a notoriously short fuse to start with, but I didn't mean to push him over the edge. I sent him an apology email and will apologize in person on Monday. Truly, I feel bad and that hasn't helped.

I feel a little better now.