Edge

It's Sunday and it's weigh in day. Today the scale told me 194. I wasn't thrilled with that. The last two weeks were 193 and I was sure today was going to be 192 or 191. What I find amusing is for the last couple of weeks, I would show something like 196 in the morning, but when I came to Sundays, I would hit 193. This week, however, I pulled a 193 almost every morning. That was good news to me and told me I was getting back to being closer to 190 again. And then it was just slightly higher today. I think I have a handle on what happened. I've discovered that the reading I get on the scale on Sunday is a direct result of what I ate on Friday. My body takes two days to show whatever damage I did to it. On Friday night, I overdid it and I didn't really mean to. But I did and I can't say that I'm 100% surprised by my weigh in. But you know what? I'm not going to worry about it. I can't. I spend way too much time beating myself up and freaking out about my weight. When I was 300 pounds, I didn't give a flying rat's ass about my weight. Now that I'm in the 190s, every pound has come to represent 10 and that's just ridiculous. I really need to go a little lighter on myself, but not too light. I'm afraid if I do, I'll be 300 again in no time.

So, today we took a little road trip and went to see Ken's mother. It's been a while since we've seen her. We did our favorite thing when we go over to visit. We went out to Sunday brunch. There's a chain called the Dakota that we go to. We have one over here, but it sucks ass. We've been a couple times, but never again. We'd actually go more often if they offered the brunch buffet here, but they don't. They do over by Ken's mom. I'm sure the rest of the menu sucks balls (and not in the good way), but their brunch is so damn good. I gave myself permission to be a gluttonous pig today. I bet I took in more calories today than I did in two or three normal days, but it's okay. Bacon is so good. Especially when it's crisp and well done. Mmmmm.... I tend to shy away from potato dishes, but they had a scalloped potato thingie that made me want to cry. I got seconds, but the second time around it wasn't nearly as good and extra salty. But my favorite part was dessert, where I had chocolate cheesecake, chocolate cake and a cream puff. It's now seven and a half hours later and I feel like I just finished eating. I'm just feeling so damn big. But I've got all week to work it off. I'm going to need moral support when I weigh in on Tuesday. If you see this huge, depressed blog on Tuesday from me, you can't say you haven't been warned. LOL!

Ken's mom lives right down the street from an outlet mall. We rarely ever go there, but both Ken and I, independant of each other, decided that it might be a good idea to go. So we did. I had it in the back of my head that I needed to buy socks. I like a big, chunky sock and most of the ones I have need to be thrown away. They actually needed to be thrown away a long time ago, but I keep things longer than I should. I found just what I was looking for in the Bass store. They were having a big sale, too. Everything in the store was an additional 40% off. Well, everything, that is, but socks. But I don't care. I needed them and I bought them. They were already at outlet prices and I got 6 pairs for $30. My feet will be warm this winter and that's all that counts. We also went into the Izod store, which, I guess, is owned by the same parent company. They were having a sale, too. Everything was 40% additional percent off of the normal 40% off. I wasn't looking for anything, but walked out with a couple of shirts and a new jacket, all for $40. I'm sure they were still making a shitload of profit, too. I feel good about all my purchases.

I'm exhausted right now. Slept for shit on Friday night and got up at the crack of dawn today to do what I needed to before heading over the border to Mass. Thankfully I have tomorrow off, though I do have a dentist appointment. Just a cleaning, but I also need to get a predetermination done on one of my teeth. I need to have a crown, I think, to repair a hairline crack I have in it. It's getting more and more annoying when I put any pressure on it and I really need to have it taken care of.