12.01.2008

6,997

6,997. That's how many page hits my blog has gotten since I added the widget that counts that kind of thing. How is that possible? This blog isn't interesting enough to warrant that kind of traffic. I need to find a widget that tells me how people get here, because it's certainly not to read this crap.

Anyway, I wasn't going to put a post up because I just finished up my November Challenge and today would have been a nice day to take a break. It's nice not having the pressure on me to pump one of these out every day. Clearly you could tell I was stretching for things to post about half way though. But I changed my mind and decided to post anyway. Hope it's worth it for you to listen to what a mess I am.

Today I had jury duty. It's the second time I've been summoned for this, but the first time I've actually had to report for it. The first time, about six years ago (give or take), I called the phone number and there must not have been any trials going on because I was told not to report, but to call the next day. I did that, was told not to report, but again, to call the next day. That third day I was officially excused. This time turned out to be different. I called and was told to report. Ken decided to bring me downtown and drop me off at the courthouse. Only problem was the building I was told to report to was closed for renovations. So Ken, doing what Ken does best, freaks out and drives around the block again. And again. All he needed to do was to let me out to figure it out, but he's too much of a control freak for that to happen. Which led to a mini spat.

Anyway, I walked around, figured out where to go and foudn a seat away from everyone else. And started waiting. Luckily I had a full slate of podcasts today (I love you, Laura and Neil) and got through a bunch of them before announcements were made. They were choosing juries for three seperate trials today. Instantly panic overtook me. I didn't want to be there in the first place, now it looks like I'm not going home anytime soon. I don't know how this whole process works and I'm fighting an anxiety attack. The room was then split up into groups and told which court room to report to. I was sent to the third floor with about 80 other people. I took my seat and the festivities began. Twenty-one people were selected at random to go sit in the jury box to be interviewed. I was not one of the first twenty-one. I was, however, panicking enough for all twenty-one. The panic was very irrational, but I was in the midst of it and tried calming myself down. And I did, a little, while this group was being evaluated. The judge explained what was going on, then had everyone stand up, state their name, where they worked, if they were married, where their spouse worked, if they had children and the ages, where they lived and if they were active in any clubs or organizations. The judge next asked a series of questions, followed by the two attorneys. Once this was all done, the attorneys and the judge conferred and picked the jurors. I was hopeful that all twelve plus both alternates would be in this bunch. But I'm dumb like that. Of the first twenty-one (actually, it was more like twenty-five... a couple people didn't make it all the way through the questioning before being excused... others were picked to replace them, causing my heart to beat quickly and my blood pressure to raise), only six made it to the jury. Damn!

At this point, the judge called for lunch, so I tried to put everything out of my head for the next hour. I can tell you I had to force myself to eat. I was nauseaus and the thought of food wasn't very appealing, but I needed to eat. I really don't know why I let myself get all worked up over stupid things like this. Part of it is I don't know how this whole thing works and I am horrified of the unknown. Irrational fear is never fun to deal with.

After lunch, the process started all over again. Twenty-one more people were called. Two people managed to weasel out of it before all twenty-one were seated, so two more were called. And I was again completely panic struck that my name was going to be called. Again, it wasn't. So as the process was going on again, I started to calm myself down. I knew they were going to be able to find eight more people in this group. I just knew it. Eight out of twenty-one. No problem. Only it didn't happen. They found seven. They still needed one more, or so I thought, but apparently one of the six from round one was now out because the judge said that two more were actually needed. There were only twenty-nine of us left (I counted) when it came time for round three. Now I'm freaking again, but not as bad because I knew it was inevitable now. I was trying to concentrate on that. The judge decided that since only two more were needed, he was only going to bring twelve people up for round three. And somehow my name still managed not to be called. Only looking at this group, I could see only one person who was for sure going to be on the jury. The rest I wasn't so sure about. But I was wrong, both alternates were found and I was excused.

It took me about another half hour to really get my bearings back. And once I was feeling better, that's when the colossal headache hit. It's five hours later and my head is still throbbing. I hate being such a fucking mess sometimes. I think I have stuff under control a vast majority of the time, but then something like this comes along and I lose my shit. It was fucking jury duty. That's it. Nothing else but jury duty. No one was dying. I didn't lose my arm in a freak combine accident. My cats didn't get hit by a bus. No one was stabbing me repeatedly with a knife. It was jury duty. I swear, I am my own worse enemy. I cause myself so much undue stress and sometimes I just don't know how to stop it.

But enough of that. I told you I'm a mess.

In other news, I mentioned yesterday that Ken has booked us a cruise for next year. I also mentioned that I haven't heard about anything but the cruise since he booked it. I didn't mention that I've heard about this cruise at least three or four days a week for the last year and a half. Well, first thing this morning, while getting ready to leave the house, I heard all about the cruise. I heard about how Ken was thinking about booking a different room. He was also thinking about booking a different date. I also heard about it the entire ride to the courthouse. And when I got home tonight, I heard all about the cruise. I heard about how he cancelled the cruise, booked a new cruise on a different cruise line for a different date. Then I got to see the difference in how the rooms look from one catalog to another. I'm officially sick to death of this cruise. All I asked him for today was one day off from cruise talk. Is that asking too much? The new cruise is a few days more than a year away. I think I'm entitled to a day with no vacation talk.

And finally, today's Christmas song is a little ditty by Winston Hewitt called "Disco Santa." Yes, it's that good.

11.30.2008

November Challenge - Completed

I still feel like crap. My voice is still a mess. And Ken won't leave me the fuck alone. Everytime I say something, it's in response to him asking me something, to which he replies that I should rest my voice. HOW THE FUCK CAN I REST MY VOICE IF YOU WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE? And when I don't answer, I just get asked again. Shoot me now. I'm begging you.

I usually get up early on Sundays to go for my walk, but I just couldn't today. Besides feeling like crap, I couldn't fall asleep last night. Again. Even with NyQuil. All this adds up to extra crabby Walt. Hurrah.

And with that being said, I would like to formally announce that either Ken or I will be dead before this time next year. Ken booked us a cruise for one year from yesterday. We've never been on a cruise before and he's been talking about it for years and years and years. He finally booked one and for the last 48 hours, I've heard nothing else but about the cruise. Midway through writing this, he came in my office for 25 minutes to tell me all about how what we can and can't bring on the boat. This thing is a year away. Do I really need to know anything about it now? Seriously. The next 364 days are going to be torture.

Today's Christmas song is from the band Over The Rhine. It's from their fabulous Christmas album called Snow Angels. I want to thank the ever fabulous Laura Smith for turning me on to this treasure.

11.29.2008

November Challenge - Day Twenty-Nine

I'm going to make this short. I'm still feeling pretty crappy and I don't want to sit on the computer all day (well, yes I do want to sit on the computer all day, but I really shouldn't. Being offline most of yesterday was painful. It's made me realize exactly how addicted to the internet I am. And that's why I don't want to sit on the computer all day....). I have things around the house that I could do and should do, like putting a dent into my backlog of trade paperbacks, or watching some of the dvds I just bought. Simple, non-taxing things.

I slept for about twelve hours last night. I really needed it. Between the stress of the last week and the strep, I was completely spent. The way I'm feeling now, I could probably lay down and take a nice nap, too. And I just might.

Even though it goes against Rule Number One, I want Ken to take me out to dinner tonight. It's the least I deserve, right? I barely ate anything yesterday, mostly because swallowing anything hurt. Swallowing still hurts right now, but luckily the antibiotics have kicked in and the pain is less severe than yesterday. Oh, what's Rule Number One, you ask? Well, Rule Number One about me is that when I'm sick, LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE. When I am sick, I can't stand anyone bothering me, babying me, coddling me. I kind of wish everyone else on the face of the earth was dead. What's funny about this is Ken is the complete opposite. When he's sick, he demands 150% attention and babying. This usually is a problem, because when he's sick, I like to apply my Rule Number One to him and leave him the fuck alone. When I'm sick, he hovers over me. It's best in my house when no one is sick.

I was very happy that I caught up on most all of my email earlier in the week, but it's starting to build up again and I just don't have the energy right now. Maybe later or tomorrow.....

Today's Christmas song is one of my all-time favorites. It's "Christmas Wrapping" by the Waitresses. I used to love the Waitresses. Still do, in fact. I could listen to them everyday if I could. I'm still really bummed out that Patty Donohue died (has it really been 12 years already?). Anyway, here's today's song.

11.28.2008

November Challenge - Day Twenty-Eight

...or "How I Spent My Black Friday Morning"

Did you ever watch FRIENDS? I used to love the show and watched it religiously for most of it's run. I remember Monica's father had the saying "pulled a Monica" which meant that someone did something that turned out wrong or worse. Well, over the years, Ken has adopted that and changed it to "pulled a Walter," and I have to say I can't really argue with him over that. Today was a prime example of me "pulling a Walter."

This has been a trying week. It has been anything but the restful, happy and stress free week I've been looking for. Yesterday was the closest to that, with one exception. I had a sore throat and was feeling a little run down. I thought to myself, all I need is a really solid night of sleep and everything will be better. Well, I got that (mostly) really good night of sleep last night, only to wake up to one of the most painful sore throats I've ever had. That's when I knew it. It's gotta be strep throat. So I shower and run over to my doctor's office. It's only 3 minutes from the house. Because of the holiday weekend, they are closing at noon today and therefore not taking any walk-ins today. Grrrr.. Luckily, there's an urgent care between my house and the doctor's office. But they don't open for another hour. Grrrrrrrrrrrr.... There's another urgent care about 15 minutes away. I get there about 15 minutes before they open, so in the meantime, I call Ken and tell him I don't feel well, I'm annoyed that the doctor wasn't taking walk-ins and the urgent care by the house is closed. I tell him I'm at the other urgent care and for him not to call me, I'll call him when I'm done. I guess I though that was enough information for him not to worry, but I was wrong. It threw him into a panic. He tried calling me, but I turned my phone off. (The urgent care went into overdrive posting "No Cell Phone" signs all over the waiting room.) He freaked out, left me two voice mails and then set out to find me. He thought I was having a heart attack or a stroke or something. You see, I hate the doctor. I hate going quite a bit. I don't ever like to go voluntarily. I have to admit, I'm better now than I used to be, but I still don't like going, so for me to call Ken and tell him I don't feel well and I'm at the doctor....

I have my appointment and sure enough, it's strep throat, just like I thought it was. I call Ken as soon as I'm out and he tells me he's half way to the urgent care. And he's crying. You need to understand, Ken doesn't cry. He's dead on the inside. And I instantly get upset that I upset him. I feel like crap enough as it is. Now I'm upset that he's upset. So that's how I pulled a Walter today.

And I guess posting on Twitter that I'm at the urgent care and then turning off my phone isn't the brightest idea. I didn't think much about it when I did it, but then I turn my phone back on and I have a handful of voicemails and text messages. Sorry, my friends. I didn't mean to alarm you. Like I said before, I pulled a Walter.

Ken made me promise that when I got home, I'd climb in bed, watch tv, read and nap. So that's what I'm going to do. But I wanted to get my daily blog post up. Only two more and I've completed my challenge! Hurrah!

For today's Christmas song, I picked something fitting for today's blogpost. The song is by Nancy LaPlante and it's called "Debbie's Last Christmas." It's about a little dying girl. It's really a horrible song, but one of those horrible songs that I ended up putting on a lot of mixtapes over the years. And since I'm on my death bed today, you get to hear about Debbie on her's, too. Enjoy.

11.27.2008

Trying Something Here

I don't know why I didn't think of doing this earlier, but it just came to me. You know how much music plays a part in my life, right? Well, why don't I post some songs here? That's a good question. Why don't I?

So between now and the end of the year, I think I'm going to post a song a day (unless I don't post!) for the holidays. Now if I have this figured out the way I do, here's how it will work. The songs will only be available for a short time only, probably not longer than a week. You should be able to get the songs by clicking the link. If this doesn't work, it just proves that I'm not as tech savvy as I thought I was (and by no means do I think I'm all that tech savvy.) Let's give it a go. Since today is Thanksgiving, today's song is "Thanksgiving Song" by Mary Chapin Carpenter from her new Christmas cd called Come Darkness, Come Light: Twelve Songs of Christmas.

November Challenge - Day Twenty-Seven

Curse you, (F)reddy, for pointing me towards another blog which has something for me to steal. So, without further ado, stolen freshly from Blair's Corner:

Grab a piece of paper quickly. Oh, and a pen or pencil too. Don't think about it. Go on. Now, without even looking at your watch or being distracted by anything else that might be going on in your world at this very moment, write down 25 things you are thankful for. Go on. Start writing. 1, 2, 3, 4 and so on. Don't stop. All the way to 25! Here I go:

1. Ken. You've given me gray hair and driven me batshit crazy for going on 15 years, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

2. Ollie & Lucy. I couldn't have asked for a pair of my loving babies than you.

3. I'm thankful for all the people I got to meet face to face this year. And I'm thankful for the friendships I have with each and every one of you.

4. I'm thankful for my friends I've yet to have face time with, but will someday.

5. Overtime.

6. Being out of retail, especially this time of year.

7. Sugar-free, fat-free chocolate pudding.




8. That I have a good, competent dentist that I genuinely like.

9. Geoff Johns

10. My fierce and chic size 34 waist.

11. The ability to carry 17,000 random songs with me wherever I go.

12. I'm thankful that there's a chance the USA will no longer look like the biggest douchebag country in the world again (starting January 20).

13. That skanks and hoes continually entertain me week in and week out on the reality shows I love so.

14. That my parents like my husband more than they like me.

15. That Tina Turner still puts out music (even though the two new songs she gave us this year were really not up to par, if you ask me)

16. Converse All-Stars

17. That I find it easier to express my feelings now to people than ever before in my life.

18. Betty White

19. That the internet has given me the chance to reconnect with so many people I've lost touch with over the years

20. I'm thankful for music in general. I can't imagine how unbearable life would be without it.

21. That I know I have so much to learn about myself and I'm not afraid to do that.

22. That my willpower has grown exponentially over the last couple of years to levels previously unknown

23. That we're inching closer to the day that I can make my relationship with valid in the eyes of the law

24. Dark Chocolate

25. That the challenge was to only come up with 25 things because this is hard.

11.26.2008

Wednesday Bonus Post

This is the fifth day of my vacation, yet it's the first one that I haven't been miserable. And of all the days, this is the one that I should have been the most miserable. Go figure. I had the dentist appointment I've been dreading for months. Today was the day to go start the work on a new crown. One of my bottom molars has been bothering me for a few months. Biting on anything hard would send sharp pains through the tooth and into my jaw. I was hoping it meant I was just going to need a new filling. But no such like. I had a fracture in the tooth and the recommended treatment was a new crown. I put it off a little while and finally decided to do something about it. I had the dentist submit a pre-determination with my insurance company to see what my out of pocket expense was going to be. It came back a couple of weeks ago saying that all but about $300 would be covered. I was shocked because a larger than expected percentage was covered.

So today was the day. The first thing my dentist says to me is we're going to get that last molar a new crown today. I stopped and said to him, "No, it's the tooth in front of it, not the back one." He disagreed and double checked his notes. His notes said it was the last one. So, to put my mind at rest, he tested my teeth and sure enough, the tooth that's been bothering me was the back molar, not the one in front of it. Sometimes, the pain expresses itself forward. I didn't know that, but I do now. The time in the chair wasn't horrible, though he did have to stop work and give me another shot of Novocaine because the first shot didn't do enough. Even that second one didn't do enough because I was still getting sharp (though dulled by the first two shots) pains when he hit the spot where the bigger of the two fractures was. I was a trooper, though. Until the first of two major offenses happened. The soft rock station plays in the background at the office. "The Shoop Shoop Song" by Cher came on and out of the blue, my dentist says "Cher should stick to acting." Hello. Does he not know he has a large faggot in the chair? A large faggot who has probably close to 400 Cher songs on his iPod? Hello? The second offense occured when he was working on my temporary crown and I could talk. Knowing I'm a huge Disney freak, he asked if I'd be recently. I told him just a couple months ago. He said that he, too, was there recently. I asked where he stayed. He told me. The Grand Floridian. I was so jealous. I wanted to pop him in the head. It would have been justifiable, right? I thought so.

Anyway, I've got a temporary crown in now for the next two weeks. The hardest part of this time is going without chewing gum. I chew a lot of gum, especially at work. Keeps me from thinking about food, which is always a good thing.

After the dentist, I ran all the errands I had. Post office, bank, BJs, a few places to pick up Christmas presents. I got almost all of my Christmas shopping done this morning. I have one more item to pick up in the store for Ken (though if he's going out on Black Friday... he usually does before work... he's picking it up.) and a little bit of internet shopping for my sister. Then I'm done.

I got home, did up all the chores I needed, played online a little bit and caught up on some reading. All in all, it's been a good day. It just sucks that it took five days to finally have a decent one, but here's hoping tomorrow is more of the same!

Happy (early) Thanksgiving to all!

November Challenge - Day Twenty-Six

Um, maybe I should start watching How I Met Your Mother.











11.25.2008

November Challenge - Day Twenty-Five

I slept for shit again last night. I was wide awake and out of bed at 5 am. So I'm going to try and make the best of today. I played online for a little bit this morning, listened to my podcasts, went and walked with the blue hairs for an hour and have now been home for almost an hour. I would imagine a nap is in my future, but we'll see. I'm planning on *gasp* not wasting the whole day playing on the computer. In fact, I'm hoping to be done with it shortly. I've got so much around the house that needs attention. So I'm making a decision now to turn off the phones, step away from the internet, get cozy with my iPod, refuse to answer the door and shut the distractions out. Today is a me day. It's the only day this week that I'm going to have a chance to do that. Yesterday Ken was home. Tomorrow I have a dentist appointment and errands. Thursday is Thanksgiving. Friday is still up in the air. We'll see.

11.24.2008

November Challenge - Day Twenty-Four

Fifty Random Statements

*I worry about my weight every day.
*I am madly in love with DC Comics' Showcase Presents line.
*My earliest celebrity crush was on Howard Jones.
*I am way pettier than I let on.
*I've met the Indigo Girls, Reba McEntire and the girls from Expose.
*I was written into an issue of Wonder Woman and then promptly killed off.
*Walt Disney World is my favorite place to vacation to.
*I spent an unhealthy amount of time on the internet.
*My favorite smell is that of baking chocolate.
*I am a music elitist.
*I would love to go to Germany someday.
*I can't drink rum.
*I am epileptic.
*I sometimes have trouble with the words "past" and "passed."
*My all-time favorite singer is Tina Turner.
*Starboy is the hottest member of the Legion of Super-Heroes.
*I once had dinner at Fred Hembeck's house.
*I love my cats more than I love anyone in my life except for Ken.
*It's been 421 days since my last soda.
*I love porn but am ashamed to admit it.
*I am very sentimental.
*My comic book obsession is taking over my life.
*Muriel's Wedding is the greatest movie of all time.
*I would like to get married someday.
*I wish I was best friends with Lisa Loeb and Jill Sobule.
*Old, drugged out Judy Garland was far superior to young, drugged out Judy Garland.
*I wish I read more.
*I am obsessed with my iTunes music library.
*I will weigh myself, pee, and then weigh myself again.
*I own Chastity Bono's album.
*I hate what has happened to the Marvel Family.
*My favorite soap opera is Guiding Light.
*I could eat an entire can of cake frosting in one sitting.
*I think Alex Puccio is the bravest man I know.
*When I was ten years old, I wanted to be Kid Flash.
*I do not have a green thumb.
*I have trouble dressing myself.
*I am stubborn.
*I share my birthday with Tina Fey.
*I dreamed about Betty White the other night.
*I've met so many wonderful friends via the internet. I'm thankful to know them.
*I'm a creature of habit, much to my husband's chagrin.
*I find detached earlobes much sexier than attached earlobes.
*I enjoy my job immensely.
*I hate my bad skin.
*I met Bob Haney once. He was surprised I knew who he was.
*I would give my left nut to be on Survivor.
*I don't make enough time to see friends.
*I am afraid of the unknown.
*I once ate an entire meal of just Andie's Candies and I got very sick from it.