The Return

My mind is kind of fried, so if this makes no sense whatsoever (like anything I write makes much sense....), you've been warned.

The last few weeks have been really trying and tiring.  I've been keeping up my extended schedule at work and then working my ass off at home nights and especially weekends.  The house is getting even closer to going on the market.  In the last week or so we've made huge strides.  Or at least it feels that way.  The last two rooms upstairs (my office and Ken's) are now 99% done.  Ceilings have been patched, sanded and painted.  Same with the walls and trim.  Wednesday they both got carpeted.  We're now in the process of getting the rooms set up the way we want them to show when it comes time for open house showings.  Ken got the basic set ups done once the carpet guys were gone.  In my office, he took a bunch of my comic boxes, stacked them in a corner, covered them with bedding and you'd think I have a bed in the room now.  It's amazing.  The guest room bed is now set up in his office, as that's now our guest room.  I need to take some pictures and show some before and afters.

Tomorrow we have a lot going on.  The handyman is coming over bright and early to get back to work in the basement.  We rented a UHaul truck tonight and tomorrow we're loading it with stuff and making a trip to the new storage unit we've rented.  That should help clean out the old guest room (now an office).  On Sunday, Sean & Jeffrey are coming over to pick up some furniture, which will help clean up the front porch.  I know we have a lot of other stuff to do and I'm blanking on the chore list (probably intentionally.)  It will be nice to start getting the house back to the non-chaotic version.  The dining room has been the workshop for the last couple of months.  Tools and paint cans and what have you all over it.  This weekend we can bring the kitchen table in off the porch (it's buried right this moment).  I'm really starting to feel good about everything.  I can see the light at the end of this tunnel.

I've noticed in the last couple of months, really since the end of last year, that I've been distancing myself from everyone and everything.  I've had so much going on that something had to give and the social aspect of my life was the easiest thing to pull back on.  I don't have a huge "real life" social life, so that was pretty easy to cut back on, but it's my "virtual" social life that's really suffered.  It's going to be a little while longer before that recovers, I fear.  I try to stay in touch, but I know I'm failing miserably with the one on one communication.  This blog has been the easiest way to keep everyone up to date on my comings and goings.  

One of the things I've managed to make the time for is the new season of Survivor.  It's another All-Stars edition of my favorite show.  All-Star editions tend to suck balls on shows like Survivor.  Shows where the eliminations are determined by the contestants.  Cliques and alliances form quickly and they get boring.  But so far, only two episodes in, I'm hooked.  This is starting off really strong and I'm just giddy.  This week's episode made me mad because my favorite player was eliminated by her dumb ass tribe.

And speaking of Survivor, I saw this posted over on Facebook tonight and it made me laugh.  Sure, you've probably seen this clip a thousand times already, with different subtitles, but this one is Survivor themed and I laughed out loud a couple of times.  If you like the show, watch this.

Bye For Now

The next step of our home improvement parade takes place tomorrow.  The final two rooms are being carpeted and that means I need to dismantle my computer and get it the hell out of here.  I'll be offline (at least via the desktop) for the next couple of days.  Don't miss me too much. :-)

Super Tuesday

Holy crap.  Yesterday was a great day (for me, at least) when it comes to new music.  Look at all the great new stuff that came out.  I'm such a happy boy right now.

And while on the topic of music, I saw this commercial posted on another website and it cracked my shit up.

Lucy Update

Ken had a meeting this evening out near where our vet is, so he picked up Lucy on the way home.  My poor baby.  She's a mess.  She's staggering.  She's stumbling.  When I look at her face, she looks all hopped up on goofballs.  She's definitely not herself, and I think I'm happy about that.  Lucy usually cries (and/or caterwauls) when she's in the car.  The entire way.  At the top of her lungs.  Ken said she barely spoke on the way home tonight, and when she did it was the most pathetic attempt at meowing.  I'm glad I wasn't in the car because I would have bawled the whole way home. She's currently locked in the back mudroom & bathroom, away from Ollie.  She's supposed to be separated from him for the time being.  It'll probably be about 24 hours before she's feeling herself again, we're told.  She's not thrilled about being locked in the back, but it's for her own good.  Ollie is curious as shit about her.  He hasn't moved from the door separating them since she got home.  I have a feeling he's going to be spending the night there, too.  I just hope she sleeps it off.

I love my babies more than I can say.

Why I Can't Have Kids

I know I've mentioned before that I entertained the idea of being a father for a little while, but quickly came to the conclusion that it's just not for me.  I think I'd make a kick ass uncle, but father?  Nope.  Here's another very valid (at least in my mind) reason I can't handle the pressures of having a kid.  Lucy had a vet appointment today.  It's the first time I've ever brought a cat in for a dental check up.  At her last regular check up, the vet said she had a lot of build up on her teeth and we should make an appointment to get that taken care of.  The appointment should have been for a few months ago, but we kept pushing it back and pushing it back.  Well, today was finally the day.  And I've been a basket case since last night.  You see, Lucy is kind of my special needs baby.  She's all fucked up inside and is on a prescription diet because her body can't process most foods.  She hates her food and would much rather eat anything else in the world.  I feel terrible, because she'll just sit and watch Ollie eat his food.  He can (and does) eat anything he wants.  It breaks my heart when I see her just watching him.  I know I'm putting human emotions and feelings on my cat when I say this, but I'm sure she's sitting there wondering why she's being punished like this.  I feel bad for her also because Ollie will beat up on her.  She's able to fight back if she wanted to, but she mostly doesn't.  I kind of feel like she's the fat retarded girl who constantly gets picked on at school and doesn't know enough to defend herself.

I called the vet a little while ago to get an update on Lucy.  They'd just finished up with her and she was still pretty groggy.  She had to have an extraction.  The tooth had a cavity below the gum line.  She has another tooth that may need extracting in the future, but not right now.  We'll reevaluate it next year.  Her gums apparently are very sensitive.  Even while unconscious she was reacting to the poking and prodding.  To tell you that I'm fighting back tears right now is no lie.  Just thinking about my poor little baby is getting me really upset.  She's going to be miserable when she gets home and I'm sure she's going to be miserable for a few days while she heals.  I'm hoping and praying we don't have any behavioral issues with her because of it.  Right now we're having slight little box issues.  She won't go near the boxes when Ollie's in one of them and twice now we've caught her trying to pee elsewhere.   One of those times we managed to chase her to the spare box in the basement.  The other time she climbed into her basket of toys and let loose.

I'm this fragile about my cat.  I can't imagine what a mess I'd be if I had a kid that had any sort of issue, whether it's a runny nose or a broken arm.

Rock

I live under a rock.  I really do.  Ken's mother was over tonight and we went out to dinner.  I commented to our server that it was really quiet in the place tonight.  It's because it's Superbowl Sunday, he replied.  My bad.  I really need to start paying a little closer attention to the news.  I mean, I knew the Superbowl was coming, but I didn't think it was for another couple of weeks.  Whatever.

It's been another weekend of home improvement bullshit.  Dmitry was back to do some more work both Saturday and Sunday.  He got a lot of stuff done, including a whole bunch of basement projects.  We still have more for him to do, but I'm thrilled by what he accomplished for us this weekend.  Ken and I started to tackle my office.  We got the rest of the stuff in there out, I took down the shelves I made, took out all the nails and screws and whatever else I had in the wall, Ken spackled, I sanded both the walls and ceiling.  I got the room taped off, all the trim sanded and washed and we got some paint up.  The ceiling isn't going nearly as smoothly as we'd hoped and that's going to require a little more work before we can paint.  And the walls can't be painted until the ceiling is done, though a lot of the cutting in has been done for the walls.  We're getting there.  For the first time, I'm feeling pretty good after what was basically a crappy, chore intensive weekend.  I'm sure I'd feel much better if we got further with my office, but I'll take what I can get.

Every Sunday Ken and I record our weight on a spreadsheet we have hanging inside the bathroom cabinet.  I was looking back at where I was at this Sunday last year and was pleasantly surprised to see I'm only 1 pound off that number.  I was 188 last year, 189 this year.  That made me really, really happy.  Of course I ate like it was my last meal tonight at dinner and I feel like I'm 289 right now, but I deserve to go a little crazy now and again.

It was a pretty long day today and the bedroom and the stack of comics on my nightstand are both screaming for me.  I think I must comply.

Progress

We're getting closer and closer to putting the house on the market.  Every day something new gets either started or finished.  Yesterday Ken put in a call  to a mortgage broker.  They talked for what seemed like hours and her preliminary run of our numbers seemed really positive.  We will be meeting with her in person soon to run real numbers and get that process going.  One of the things Ken's been freaking out about is "what if we can't get a mortgage or a mortgage of sufficient funds to buy what we want."  His mind is now at ease.

Tonight I didn't stay late at work (it was actually still light out when I left!) because I had some stuff to do at home.  My office is now almost completely empty.  The stacks and stacks of boxes of comics are out of the closet and resting in the guest room.  I lugged all four of the bookshelves downstairs and put them out on the porch.  Some of the clutter from the guest room has now be returned to where it belongs.  All that's left in here is my desk and the guest room bed.  The bed has been leaning against the wall since we cleaned the rest of the house out to have the floors done back in December.  I need a hand moving it out and Ken didn't get home until just a short while ago.  My office needs to have the ceiling and walls painted, the trim touched up and new carpet installed.

Work has been both very busy this week and just plain crazy.  The first week of the month is always my really busy week as I have extra projects to tackle.  And it's a well known fact that I sit right in the middle of the highest concentration of mentally ill employees.  Most days I enjoy it because it always means I'm going to get a show, but sometimes it's scary.  Right now it's been pretty scary.  I've been trying to keep my head down and not make a target of myself, because I feel like any of the four mentally ill neighbors could pull out a gun at any minute.  Good times!

LOST starts tonight.  I'm excited that it's back, but annoyed that I have to add more television to my schedule.  Thursday night SURVIVOR unofficially starts with an anniversary special.  The actual season starts next week.  Again, very, very excited/annoyed.

I Need...

 I used to have a couple of great music blogs to read, but they're long gone and I miss them.  Does anyone who reads this dreck know of any good music blogs?  I'm lost as to what new stuff is coming out, who the new buzz artists are and all that jazz.  Help!

Goodwill

I have a hard time getting rid of things.  I don't think that should come as a surprise to anyone who knows me.  I think I've got a collector's mentality about many things.  I've been buying, reading and collecting comics since I was ten years old, and comics are things that you buy and save.  So not discarding things just seems natural to me.  With all the preparations we've been doing to get the house in decent shape, I've started learning how to purge.  We have so much stuff in this house, it's unbelievable.  It's not Hoarders volume, but it's still too much stuff.  As we've been purging room after room, the whole process seems to be getting easier.  Having rooms without clutter feels great.

This morning I made another breakthrough.  I decided it was time to get rid of my fat clothes.  They've been packed up in totes in the basement for a couple of years now.  I was very hesitant to EVER get rid of them.  My reasoning made perfect sense to me.  The clothes are perfectly good.  Sure, they don't fit, but if I ever gain the weight back, I won't have to go out and buy new clothes.  If I never gain the weight back, well that's great, too.  They can stay in the basement.  Today I realized that if they never fit me again, I'm still going to have to move them and that's the last thing I want to lug around with me.  So I lugged them up to the living room and sorted them out, bagged them up and brought them to Goodwill.  This is how serious I was about doing it.  It only got up to 11 or 12 degrees today.  And I still made a point of going outside and loading up the car only to unload it when I got there.  Brrrrrrrr..

While we were sorting out the clothes, Ken handed me a pair of my old pants.  They were a pair he bought me when I started my new job back in December 2005.  I couldn't believe how roomy they are now.

Then I found one of my favorite old shirts.  Since I tried on the pants, I had to try on the shirt, too.  Doesn't it look good on me?

Finally, I just love this shot.  It blows my mind to see it.  I still don't believe I'm this thin.  My brain still refuses to acknowledge that I look like this.  I want to tattoo it on the inside of my eyelids or something because that is not the body I see when I think about myself or even when I look in the mirror.  But in pictures I can see it.

Pushing Myself

I push myself pretty hard.  As much as I like to goof off (and trust me, I find time to do that), I still push myself pretty hard to do things I don't necessarily want to do.  It's now Friday night and I'm feeling exhausted.  That's pretty typical for me because of how I push myself during the work week.  My normal work schedule is Monday through Friday 8:30 am to 4:30 pm.  Because we're offered plenty of overtime, I try to take full advantage of it and I've been pretty successful at doing so for the past year plus.  I'm usually to work between 6:45 and 7 am every morning, depending on the bus.  With the exception of Fridays, it's rare that I leave work at 4:30.  My job is not a difficult one, but I still end the week ready to drop.  I keep pushing myself to do the overtime because it can disappear at any time.  I like having the extra money, though I've been doing it for so long now that I don't realize what's my regular salary and what's overtime anymore.  If you were to ask me how much my regular take home pay is, I couldn't answer you.  (To be honest, I'm not quite sure what my pay is with the overtime in it.  Since combining our finances, Ken deals with the bills and I'm kind of lost to where we are right now.  Bad Walt!)  I keep telling myself that I can let up on the overtime, but I don't seem to listen.  I was in a slight panic at the start of the current pay period.  Our periods run bi-weekly starting on a Thursday.  The new pay period started last week and I had to call out on the first day because of the furnace issues.  Not only that, but Ken called me at work on Tuesday and asked if I could leave work at 4:30 because he was going to be detained at the office and he needed me to do something for him.  That's two days where I wasn't going to spend way too much time at work.  I didn't know what to do.  I think that's a sign that I've been working WAY too much.  I really need to pull back, but I have some things that I'd love to do this year that I can't justify unless I put in the extra hours for the extra cash.  

I push myself to exercise.  I don't particularly enjoy it most days, but I know I need to do it to keep from becoming a blimp again.  For the most part, I don't mind walking.  It's an easy exercise and it's really the only activity I've done since starting my diet.  This time of the year it blows, though.  I only walk on Sundays.  I get up at the crack of dawn and head to the mall before the rest of the blue hairs get there.  Once the weather gets better, I can get back outside and walk.  I enjoy walking home from work.  I enjoy walking around the office campus near my house.  I don't really enjoy walking in the mall.  I also find I don't enjoy working out to the EA Sports Active for the Wii.  That's more because it drives home the point that I have no muscles at all.  I'm just over half way through the 30 Day Workout (Beginner Level) and it kicks my ass every single day.  I have long conversations with the game each workout.  And by "long conversations" I mean I swear at my virtual personal trainer, I call him names, I tell him (to fuck) off.  But I do the program and I'm starting to see and feel the results.  And that makes me very happy.

I guess I push myself to do things so I'll have stuff to whine about.  And that's something I'm really good at!