Scouting For Girls - Love How it Hurts

Mish Mash

Sunday evening, I've had a couple beers and I feel like blogging, but I don't know what I want to talk about.  I know there's stuff sitting in my head waiting to come out, but I'm sure that's not going to be any of this.

I love that right now, two beers is all it takes to get me buzzing.  I've always been a cheap date, but this is getting ridiculous.  I love that we have beer in the house right now.  We don't usually keep too much, if any, on hand, but we've got leftovers from last weekend when we had the Danburys here.  I purposely don't buy beer because if it's here, I'll drink it.  It's one of the few areas in my dietary life where my self control is in full effect.  Ken will occasionally buy beer, but we have differing tastes in it that it's not a temptation to me.  I like dark beer.  The darker the better.  It tastes so good to me.  Ken can't stand it.  He's my polar opposite and likes the lighter beers.  I don't mind them, but I'd much rather drink something I can't see through.

Friday night was pretty emotional in my house.  I wasn't going to watch the NY Senate debate and ultimately shoot down the marriage equality bill again, but I turned the tv on just before going to bed and I watched the tail end of it.  And I don't know what happened, but the bill actually passed.  It passed.  In New York State, it's now legal for me to marry my partner of seventeen years.  I'm really not prepared for this.  I really never thought in my lifetime that this would be a possibility.  I know I could drive to Mass or Connecticut and get married if I wanted to, but because it wasn't legal in NY, it didn't seem like it would count.  Sure, New York will recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states, but until this weekend, it wasn't legal to actually do it in New York.  Now that that's changed, I have every intention of marrying Ken.  My biggest dilemma is how we're going to do this.  Do we have a big ceremony?  Do we keep it small and intimate?  Do we elope?  Do we just do it now and have a big party later?  I'm really lost as to what we do next.  I'm not one who likes to be the center of attention (in general), so having a big wedding bash doesn't feel like me.  I would like to celebrate it with my friends, but I just don't know how yet.  Ken would love to do a destination thing.  He figures that since a large percentage of our friends do not live locally, they'd have to travel if they wanted to come anyway, so why not go someplace fun?  I kind of like this idea, but it wouldn't really include the wedding part since we'd have to have the ceremony here in the first place.  Too many things to sort out first.  My head is still spinning and I imagine it will for a little while longer.  Tomorrow I get to face the deluge of questions and comments from co-workers.  Joy.

I've been on a big Adam Ant/Adam & The Ants kick for the last week.  I don't know what brought it on, but I'm enjoying revisiting the music.  And because I can get lost at Wikipedia for hours and hours and hours and hours, I ended up on Adam's wiki page and discovered he's got a new album coming out sometime in 2012.  How excited am I?

I bought a tub of ice cream today when I was out grocery shopping.  I was really craving it earlier, but now I'm feeling guilty that I bought it.  I could have gotten away with getting a smaller container of ice cream, but the flavor I was craving (it's chocolate smothered in ribbons of peanut butter) didn't come in a smaller container.  But fuck it.  I work my ass off keeping in shape.  I deserve a treat.

I dragged Ken to see Green Lantern this weekend.  I haven't been to a movie in a couple years (seriously.  The last thing I saw in the theaters was For Your Consideration.) and I really wanted to see this.  Usually I end up waiting for the dvd and I'm just as happy about it.  This movie, while I did enjoy it, would have probably been a better dvd than movie theater choice.  It really failed to hit the mark it should have hit.  I'm not sure exactly where it went wrong.  I thought the cast was well chosen and they all hit their marks.  (Well, except for Tim Robbins, who felt like he was just there for the paycheck.)  I thought the overall story wasn't bad.  I think what it was for me was there was minimal action.  It took forever for it to start and then it seemed to end way too quickly.  There was entirely too much standing around and talking rather than doing, if that makes sense.  I went with Ken, who knows nothing about comics.  We went in with different eyes and came out with the same opinion of the movie, which is rare for a movie like this.  They tried to cater to both the comic book fans by giving us lots of backstory and inside things that non-comic fans wouldn't get.  They tried to cater to non-comic fans, as well, but in trying to please both groups, they failed.  There was too much backstory for the casual movie goer. So much of it was unnecessary to the movie and it held things back.  The comic fans already know this stuff and didn't need a primer on it.  They could have done away with a lot of it and replaced it with actual action and it would have been a much better movie.  There was one huge plus to this movie for me and that was the guy who played Sinestro.  Although he didn't get to do much of anything but speak, he nailed that role like no one else could have.  Of all the comic book movies I've ever seen, he was the most perfect casting of an existing comic book character.  Ever.  The sequel (if there is one) should heavily feature him.  I hope they learn from their mistakes of this first film if they do get to do a second.

You've Come A Long Way Baby

I've been feeling pretty damn good about my body lately.  It's a rarity, for sure.  I have a distorted view of what I think my body really looks like.  I look in the mirror, but I don't see what other people see.  I still see myself as being much bigger than I really am.  Not as big as I used to be, but definitely not as slim as I really am.  In fact, it's rare that I would use the word slim to describe myself.  Anyway, a week or so ago I was feeling extra positive about how I looked, so I snapped a picture to remind me of this.  And then I thought nothing about it until tonight when I was loading pictures from my phone to the computer.  I'm glad I took this because I was going to write a little blog post about the next picture.

Over the weekend, my friend Lori posted this picture of me and Lynn on her Facebook page.  I got a notification that I was tagged in a picture, so I went and found it.  And my jaw nearly hit the ground.  I immediately posted a comment on the picture saying something along the lines that I couldn't believe how horrible a picture it was.  I didn't say that because I was mad that she posted in.  In fact, I was so excited she did.  But she took it the wrong way and removed the picture.  It bummed me out because I went to go make it my profile picture, but it was gone.  I had her send it to me so I could repost it and make it my profile picture.  

This is the single most disgusting picture I've ever seen of myself.  I cannot believe that I ever let myself get to that point.  I knew I was fat, but much like I have difficulty seeing myself as slender now, I had a really hard time as seeing myself as grossly obese.  Looking at the picture right now makes me feel like someone just hit me in the back of the head with a solid wood baseball bat.  And it also fills me with so much self-esteem, something I lack most days.  I am so fucking proud of all that I've accomplished with my body in the nearly five years since I committed to getting healthy.  Two years to lose the weight and now nearly three years at my goal.  I'm Superman!

Weekend Pictures

 Within minutes of arriving, The Danburys found the liquor stash.  We made sure it was stocked up good and tall.  I know what it's like having to deal with me for an extended period of time.  The liquor made it easier for them just like it does for Ken.

Off to Lake George for the parade.  For a moment, I thought we were in the middle of Footloose.

Before anything else, we stopped in a Christmas shop.  The boys were in search of some ornaments from a series they collect.  Me, I just poked around and found this!

Kevin, pre-parade.

After the pit stop, we headed back to the car so Kevin could gather his marching gear.  Here, Brian attempts to demonstrate the proper usage of Kevin's disco stick.

Ken and Brian

Ken

Kevin, leading his group.

Kevin, all business.

Kevin, leading on to victory.  His group ended up winning first place during the judging part of the parade.  I had no idea that besides just marching, all the different groups were competing for prizes.  There were so many different drum corps and other groups marching.  But no one was better!  I take full credit for this, naturally.

After the parade, we headed home, Kevin showered, we had beverages and unwound for a bit before heading out to dinner.

Brian and I had calamari

Totally out of character for me, but I got a baked veggie wrap.  I did enough damage earlier in the day with McDonalds and a big ass burrito (which was heavenly).

Dessert was had at the ice cream shop at the drive-in around the corner from the house.  I got a large cookie dough, even though I wasn't hungry.  The Danburys practically forced me to get it.

And if that's not bad enough, the following morning they forced me to get the french toast covered in fruit, whipped cream and ice cream.  One had to hold me down while the other force fed me.  All I wanted was a small slice of cantaloupe.  

The weekend got two thumbs up.

Monday Blah

Still really tired from the last few days.  Kevin & Brian, aka The Danburys, were here this weekend.  Kevin was marching in the Fireman's Parade in Lake George on Saturday, and we decided to make a full weekend of them being here.  I had a lot of fun.  I got to be hateful and wretched without Ken yelling too much at me.  Sounds like a winning weekend to me!

I allowed myself to indulge in food that I've been really good about staying away from.  I had an amazing burrito in Lake George. I had ice cream for dessert Saturday night and then again for breakfast on Sunday morning.  I would normally feel like crap for eating like an eleven year old boy left home alone for a week, but not so much. It felt nice.  I did end my eight day run of being under 190 lbs, but it was worth it.  It'll take me a couple days to get back there, so I know it should be pretty easy.

I have some pictures, but I haven't moved them from my phone to the computer yet, so I'll post them later.

Just In Time For This To Fail (Yet Again) In New York

Nothing, Really

Today was the sixth day in a row that I weighed in at less than 190 lbs.  This has never happened before in my adult life.  Lately I've been hovering right around the 190 mark, but this is the longest run I've had below it.  I've been working my ass off trying to maintain it and I'm succeeding.  I've got company coming this weekend and I know I'll blow it then, but for now I'm enjoying the hell out of it.  

I just bought some new shorts over the weekend.  Size 34 waist.  And I've found that they're loose on me.  I've also noticed my pants seem a little bit looser, too.  I can't believe that I might be working my way down another size.  I'm not trying to do that.  I don't want to do that.  But it looks like it's happening.  I don't want to have to go and buy all new clothes again.  I thought I was done with that.  We'll see how things go, though.  The fact that I'm in a 34 at all still, to this day, blows my mind.  I don't remember EVER being in anything smaller than a 36 growing up, getting all the way up to a 44.  I amaze myself sometimes.

Surprise packages in the mail make me happy.  Especially when I'm having a crappy kind of day.  I got one today and I'm still smiling thinking about it.

Shit.  There was one other completely unrelated thing I wanted to say and now it's gone.

The Mercy Seat

I have been playing this song over and over again today. I just can't get enough of it.

Comic Book Post Update

DC has now released the solicitations about what is going to be in the first issue of each of their new books.  It gives me a slightly better picture of the new directions these books are taking.  I have to say that after reading those descriptions, I'm definitely off the fence on the titles I was on.  I'm going to be reading even less than what I initially thought.

Comic Book Post

I don't even know where to start with this one.  

This week has been a very emotional week for me in regards to my favorite hobby.  I've been reading and collecting comic books since just before my 10th birthday.  For those who can't do the math, it means comic books have been a big part of my life for the last 35 years.  I remember the day my obsession started.  I was living in Hudson, NY and went up to the corner Stewart's.  I'm not sure what the reason for my trip was (maybe I needed candy?), but I stopped at the spinner rack in the front window and looked at what was there.  I settled on a Superman #302.  I was hooked from that day.  No matter where we lived, I always managed to find a store nearby that sold comic books.  I would spend my allowance money on comics.  I'd spend my lunch money on comics.  I'd spend my paper route money on comics.  DC Comics were my favorites.  I'd rarely ever pick up a Marvel comic.  They looked way too cheesy for me.  There was something about the stable of heroes DC offered that really spoke to me.  I was particularly fond of the super-team books.  Justice League of America and Teen Titans were my favorites.  Each book would be chock full of heroes.  You got more bang for your buck that way.

A lot of comic book reading kids outgrow their hobby, but I never did.  All through high school, I hid my obsession so as to avoid being mocked and picked on any more than I already was.  But after school or at lunch time, I would walk down to the newsstand and load up on whatever books looked interesting to me.  Near the end of high school, I got a part time job at a comic shop.  It was a dream job.  Where else could you go and get paid to read comics?  Seriously?

I've been a loyal and faithful DC reader my entire comic book collecting life.  I've been with them through the good and I've stuck by them through the bad (and there's been a lot of bad.)  I've watched them try to streamline their line of books on more occasions than I care to recall.  But I stuck by them because they put out the books I loved featuring the characters I've grown to care about.

Like I said earlier, this has been a very emotional week for me.  DC had made the news by announcing they are cancelling their entire line of DC Universe books and relaunching that entire line with 52 brand new #1s.  While that in itself might normally have me excited, it's actually a crushing blow to me.  They are retooling their entire line.  Not just starting all the books over again at #1, but drastically changing everything I've grown to care about.  This is a total overhaul.  A reboot.  A revamp.  A retooling.  Everything I love about DC has been taken away and replaced with what DC hopes will attract a new fanbase with.  While I understand DC wanting to increase the number of readers in a dwindling market, I don't think this is the way to go about it.  You don't search out new readers at the expense of the old.  DC calls this the perfect jumping on point for new readers, but for the first time in history, they've made it a convenient jumping off point for old readers. 

All week long I couldn't put into words why I was feeling so bad about this.  But it dawned on me that it's almost like seeing an old friend die.  Superman and I have been tight since I was a pre-teen.   Wonder Woman and I have been through a lot together in the last 35 years.  And now it's all gone and about to be replaced with strangers.  I know I sound ridiculous.  It's just comics.  But it's more than that to me.

I've read the new announcements each day as they've happened.  Each day I'd feel sadder and sadder as I saw what they were doing to my favorite hobby.

I want to be optimistic about all of this.  I keep trying to find something to get excited about.  I'm extremely torn now about what I'm going to do come September when the new line launches.  Part of me says to just dump comics altogether.  Part of me says to suck it up and try these new versions.  I think what I'm going to do is try whatever books look interesting to me.  There are a few.  The rest I think I'm just going to avoid like the plague and wait six months for them to get cancelled, only to be replaced with another reimagining.

DC is really good about coming up with big ideas.  But they're also really good about fucking them up or failing with the follow through.  Look at the last time they tried to tweak their books.  One Year Later spun out of the book 52.  The DC line took a jump of one year in between one issue and the next of all their series.   A bunch of new books were introduced.  A lot of creative teams were shuffled around.  While it was a good idea on paper, it didn't pan out.  The new creative teams on a lot of books were just bad.  (Bruce Jones on Nightwing?  Walt Simonson on Hawkgirl?)  The new books that were introduced failed and were cancelled.  DC didn't react quick enough to what they were hoping was a good idea.

Look at the last Wonder Woman relaunch.  Allan Heinberg relaunched the book, but couldn't meet his deadlines.  The book floundered for a year before DC did anything to fix the mess.  Gail Simone came in and wrote the hell out of that book.  Unfortunately for her, most of the wind was gone from the sails of the relaunch by the time she came aboard.  Judd Winick relaunched Titans.  And it was awful.  He was gone within a year and DC had no back up plan.  The book became a showcase for fill-in stories that were unmemorable and quite frankly, a waste of time and money.  It took a year or so for them to find a new, bad direction for the book.  Too much, too little, too late.  The Superman books just finished telling the World of New Krypton story and to be honest, the Superman books haven't been this good in years.  To follow up, they hire J. Michael Straczynski to write the next big storyline in which Superman walks across America.  Huh?  A couple months into his year long story, he quits.  DC should have wrapped this drivel up then, but they didn't.  Ditto for Wonder Woman.

I'm hyper critical of DC because I love DC.  I want DC to succeed.  But at the first sign of trouble, DC shoves it's head in the sand and pretends everything is okay, ignoring the problem and hoping no one will notice.  I can only imagine what a disaster the new DCU is going to be once we hit the first bit of rough water.  It doesn't help that DC has hired a new editor-in-chief who appears to be so far out of touch with the comics industry that it makes me want to cry.  Mr. Harris, the 90s were an embarrassment to comics fans.  You sir are trying to bring them back for what reason?

*sigh*

And here are the fifty-two new series (with my comments in red):

ACTION COMICS 

A new era of DC Comics begins as the longest-running monthly comic of all time releases its first issue #1 since 1938.

This September, New York Times bestselling writer Grant Morrison (ALL-STAR SUPERMAN) joins with sensational artist Rags Morales to bring you tales of The Man of Tomorrow unlike any you’ve ever read before in ACTION COMICS #1. This momentous first issue will set in motion the history of the DC Universe as Superman defends a world that doesn’t trust their first Super Hero.

The first Action Comics #1 is now the most sought-after comic book of all time. This September, one of comics’ most imaginative storytellers will make history again in Grant Morrison and Rags Morales’ ACTION COMICS #1.

This is a book I'm torn on.  I really loved Grant Morrison's All-Star Superman.  But there is just as much stuff by Grant Morrison I just don't like.  I'm willing to wait and see.  After all, I stuck by the current Superman walking across America storyline running through the regular Superman book.  

 ALL-STAR WESTERN

Even when Gotham City was just a one-horse town, crime was rampant – and things only get worse when bounty hunter Jonah Hex comes to town. Can Amadeus Arkham, a pioneer in criminal psychology, enlist Hex’s special brand of justice to help the Gotham Police Department track down a vicious serial killer? Featuring back-up stories starring DC’s other western heroes, ALL-STAR WESTERN #1 will be written by the fan-favorite Jonah Hex team of Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti and illustrated by Moritat.

I thought the idea behind the whole revamp of the DC Universe was to make books that might be inaccessible more accessible to new readers.  Jonah Hex was probably the most accessible book DC put out.  All you needed to know was Jonah Hex was a scarred and bad-ass bounty hunter.  That's it.  Now they're trying to entrench him into the Bat universe?  Seriously?  They need to do that?

 ANIMAL MAN

Buddy Baker has gone from “super” man to family man – but is he strong enough to hold his family together when Maxine, his young daughter, starts to manifest her own dangerous powers? Find out in ANIMAL MAN #1, the start of a dramatic new series by acclaimed writer Jeff Lemire and artists Travel Foreman and Dan Green.

I'm sure this has potential, but the description makes me want to avoid it like the plague.

 AQUAMAN

Geoff Johns, one of comics’ greatest storytellers, reunites with GREEN LANTERN and BRIGHTEST DAY collaborator Ivan Reis to bring you a thrilling new take on the fan-favorite hero of the sea in AQUAMAN #1. The cover to issue #1 is by Ivan Reis and Joe Prado.

This one is a definite for me.  Say what you will about Geoff Johns, but he's my favorite writer.  I have faith in him to give me a book I'm going to enjoy.

 BATGIRL

Batgirl’s going to have to face the city’s most horrifying new villains as well as dark secrets from her past in BATGIRL #1, the stunning debut issue from fan-favorite writer Gail Simone and artists Ardian Syaf and Vicente Cifuentes.

This is the book I'm the most on the fence about out of the entire line up.  I love Batgirl.  I love Gail Simone.  But the very thought of putting Barbara Gordon back into the Batgirl costume really hits a nerve.  They're taking arguably DC's most interesting and fascinating character (Oracle) and completely disregarding everything she has come to be and to represent.  I feel like it's a big fat slap in the face of her fan base.

 BATMAN

In the first BATMAN #1 since 1930, New York Times bestselling writer Scott Snyder teams up with superstar artist Greg Capullo in his DC Comics debut! In the series, Bruce Wayne once again becomes the only character taking on the Batman name.

They claim the Batman family of books are supposed to see the smallest degree of changes.  We'll see.  I will be picking this one up.  I think the current storyline that Scott Snyder is writing in Detective Comics is the best Batman story in years.

 BATMAN AND ROBIN

In BATMAN AND ROBIN #1, the acclaimed creative team of Peter Tomasi and Pat Gleason will explore the family dynamic of the Caped Crusader as Bruce Wayne battles the Gotham underworld with the help of his son, Damian, in the role of Robin.

I haven't read Peter Tomasi's current Batman and Robin.  I will probably read this in trade, the way I'm reading the current series.

BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT 

In BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT, superstar artist David Finch writes and draws a twisted adventure that pulls Bruce Wayne deep into the halls of the famed Arkham Asylum, a jail for Gotham City’s most dangerous and criminally deranged. Finch will team up with collaborator Jay Fabok on pencils.

I've been anxious to read the current series by the same title.  I've been waiting for it to be collected in paperback, but I guess it's been so delayed that only two issues have come out so far.  I guess I'll be waiting a long time.  I don't have any interest in reading this monthly.  I'll wait and see and if I hear good things, I'll pick up the collection.

 BATWING

This September, join with us in this historic moment when the first black character to wear the Batman mantle will be the first to star in his own ongoing series. BATWING will be written by Judd Winick and illustrated by Ben Oliver.

I'm curious, but at the same time, it's being written by Judd Winick.  He's either hit or miss with me.  I loved when he wrote Green Arrow.  I hated when he wrote Titans.  This is another wait and see title.

BATWOMAN 

The highly-anticipated new series from the multiple award-winning creative team of J.H. Williams III, Haden Blackman and Amy Reeder begins in BATWOMAN #1.

This is a definite.  I understand the first few issues are done, so I don't know how this is going to fit into the rebooted universe.

BIRDS OF PREY 

The Birds of Prey are Gotham City’s covert ops team, taking down the villains other heroes can’t touch. Mystery novelist ands comics writer Duane Swierczynski teams up with Jesus Saiz for BIRDS OF PREY #1, the first issue of the hard-hitting new series.

I love the current series by Gail Simone.  This looks like one big insult.  From the line up of characters to the redesigns of their costumes, it looks like something that will be cancelled by issue 12.

BLACKHAWKS 

Blackhawk is an elite group of mercenaries made up of brave men from around the world equipped with the latest in cutting-edge hardware and vehicles. Their mission: Kill the bad guys before they kill us. A set of contemporary tales that battle the world’s gravest threats, BLACKHAWKS #1 will be written by Mike Costa and illustrated by Ken Lashley.

Pass.

 BLUE BEETLE

It’s not easy being Jaime Reyes. He has to deal with high school, family and all the drama that comes with being a teenager. Also, he’s linked to a powerful scarab created by an alien race who seek to subjugate planets – or annihilate them. It’s up to one teen hero to turn this instrument of destruction into a force for good in BLUE BEETLE #1, written by Tony Bedard (GREEN LANTERN CORPS) and illustrated by Ig Guara (FLASHPOINT: GRODD OF WAR) and Ruy Jose.

The book was cancelled once due to poor sales.  I predict 12 issues before it meets a similar fate.

CAPTAIN ATOM

Captain Atom has all the power in the world, but no hope of saving himself. Charged by nuclear energy, possessing vast molecular powers, he has the potential to be a god among men – a hero without limits. But the question is this: Will he lose himself in the process? JT Krul and artist Freddie Williams II take the character in a bold new direction in CAPTAIN ATOM #1. The cover to issue #1 is by Stanley “Artgem” Lau.

I know I'm judging a book by it's cover, but this looks like shit.

CATWOMAN

Meet Catwoman. She’s addicted to the night. Addicted to shiny objects. Addicted to Batman. Most of all, Catwoman is addicted to danger. She can’t help herself, and the truth is – she doesn’t want to. She’s good at being bad, and very bad at being good. Find out more about what makes Catwoman tick in CATWOMAN #1, written by Judd Winick and illustrated by Guillem March.

Judd Winick.  A wait and see title.  I have a feeling it's going to be a big, fat pass.

 DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS

The anthology series gets a new look in DC Universe Presents, a new series that will focus on multi-issue story arcs each featuring a different superhero from the DC Universe’s rich cast of characters, told by some of comics’ most exciting writers and artitsts. DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS #1 kicks off the first arc of the series: a Deadman story by Paul Jenkins and Bernard Chang. The cover to issue #1 is by Ryan Sook.

I like Paul Jenkins.  I like Deadman.  I'll wait and see if it's any good and maybe pick up a trade.

 DEATHSTROKE

A metahuman mercenary who made a living taking out the toughest targets, Deathstroke will reclaim his fearsome legacy by any means necessary in DEATHSTROKE #1, a new series from rising star Kyle Higgins (Batman: Gates of Gotham) and artists Joe Bennett and Art Thibert.

Ugh.  Are they serious?  

 DEMON KNIGHTS

Set in the Middle Ages, the Demon leads an unlikely team to defend civilization and preserve the last vestiges of Camelot against the tide of history. Critically-acclaimed writer Paul Cornell and artists Diogenes Neves and Oclair Albert combine sorcery, swords and superheroes in DEMON KNIGHTS #1.

I give this book 12 issues (and I'm feeling generous).  I was going to pass on this, but I really think Paul Cornell is a fantastic writer.  I'm going to pick up the first issue even though I realize that the Demon is not a series that people care about, nor will they support.

 DETECTIVE COMICS

DC Comics’ flagship title is relaunched for the first time ever in DETECTIVE COMICS #1 by acclaimed writer/artist Tony Daniel. Marking the first time Batman will appear in a debut issue of Detective Comics, the series will find Bruce Wayne on the trail of a dangerous serial killer known only as the Gotham Ripper.

I like Tony Daniel's Batman book.  I'm willing to try.

 FLASH

Rising superstar Francis Manapul, fresh off his acclaimed run on THE FLASH with Geoff Johns, makes his comics writing debut in THE FLASH #1, sharing both scripting and art duties with Brian Buccellato. The Flash knows he can’t be everywhere at once, but what happens when he faces an all-new villain who can? The cover to issue #1 is by Francis Manapul and Brian Buccellato.

This doesn't look promising.

 FRANKENSTEIN, AGENT OF SHADE

Frankenstein and his network of strange beings work for an even stranger government organization: The Super Human Advanced Defense Executive. It’s the breakout hero of Seven Soldiers as you’ve never seen him before in FRANKENSTEIN, AGENT OF SHADE #1, the first issue of a dark new series from acclaimed writer Jeff Lemire (Sweet Tooth, The Nobody) and artist Alberto Ponticelli.

This was one of the two Seven Soldiers books that I liked.  I'm going to try it.

 THE FURY OF FIRESTORM

Welcome to a major new vision of the Nuclear Man as writers Ethan Van Sciver and Gail Simone team up with artist Yildiray Cinar to deliver THE FURY OF FIRESTORM #1. Jason Rusch and Ronnie Raymond are two high school students, worlds apart – and now they’re drawn into a conspiracy of super science that bonds them forever in a way they can’t explain or control. The cover to issue #1 is by Ethan Van Sciver.

My love for Gail Simone can't get me to buy this horse shit.

 GREEN ARROW

Oliver Queen is an orphan who grew up to fight crime as the Green Arrow, a billionaire playboy who uses his fortune to become a superhero – able to fight the most powerful super-villains in the universe with nothing but a bow and arrow. JT Krul will write GREEN ARROW #1 with art by superstar artist Dan Jurgens. The cover to issue #1 is by Brett Booth.

Nope.

 GREEN LANTERN #1

Geoff Johns has been charting the adventures of Hal Jordan and the GREEN LANTERN Corps since GREEN LANTERN: Rebirth, collaborating with such major artists as Ethan Van Sciver, Darwyn Cooke, Prentis Rollins, Marlo Alquiza and Mick Gray.

This fall, Johns reunites with artists Doug Mahnke and Christian Alamy, as the series begins anew with GREEN LANTERN #1 with cover by Ivan Reis and Joe Prado. Together they will continue to thrill readers and expand the Green Lantern mythos.

Change is coming. But set aside your fear. It’ll be worth the wait.

Additional titles include:

GREEN LANTERN CORPS #1

When deadly conflicts emerge across the universe, it’s up to Guy Gardner, John Stewart and an elite Green Lantern strike force to keep the peace.

GREEN LANTERN CORPS #1 will be written by Peter J. Tomasi with art by Fernando Pasarin and Scott Hanna. The cover to #1 is by Doug Mahnke and Christian Alamy.

GREEN LANTERN: THE NEW GUARDIANS #1

Who are The New Guardians?

The power of Rage, Avarice, Fear, Will, Hope, Compassion and Love combine to be the most powerful (and colorful) team in the corps under the leadership of Kyle Rayner. Beware their power . . . and their volatility!

GREEN LANTERN: THE NEW GUARDIANS #1 will be written by Tony Bedard and illustrated with cover by Tyler Kirkham and Batt.

RED LANTERNS #1

Going solo. Atrocitus and his Red Lantern Corps return in their own series, battling against injustice in the most bloody ways imaginable. This Lantern Corps takes no prisoners, they are judge, jury and executioners!

RED LANTERNS #1 will be written by Peter Milligan with art and cover by Ed Benes and Rob Hunter.

I'm willing to give them a shot.  I enjoy the Green Lantern books currently.  I'm hoping that not much changes, though I know I'm a fool for thinking that.

 GRIFTER

Ex-black ops agent Cole Cash is a charming grifter that few can resist. And yet he’s about to be branded a serial killer when he begins hunting and exterminating inhuman creatures hidden in human form – creatures only he can see. Can the biggest sweet talker of all time talk his way out of this one when even his brother thinks he’s gone over the edge? Find out in GRIFTER #1, written by Nathan Edmondson with art by CAFU and BIT (the team behind T.H.U.N.D.E.R. AGENTS).

Really?  PASS!

 HAWK & DOVE

It’s up to the living avatars of war and peace to root out the hidden forces who look to plunge the country into a deadly civil war in HAWK AND DOVE #1. The exciting new series will be written by Sterling Gates and illustrated by legendary superstar comics artist Rob Liefeld.

Another book I'm torn on.  I think Sterling Gates is a rock solid writer.  I think Rob Liefeld is one of the worst artists working in comics.  I think I'm going to have to pass on this one.

 I, VAMPIRE

Vampires threaten to bring ruin to the DC Universe in I, VAMPIRE #1 by rising star Josh Fialkov and artist Andrea Sorrentino. Tortured by his centuries-old love for the Queen of the Damnned, Andrew Bennett must save humanity from the violent uprising of his fellow vampires, even if it means exterminating his own kind.

It might be too Twilight-y for me, but I'm going to pick up the first issue anyway.

JUSTICE LEAGUE 

On Tuesday, we made the announcement in USA Today that DC was undertaking a historic renumbering of 52 superhero titles across the line, starting with JUSTICE LEAGUE #1 by our superstar creators Geoff Johns and Jim Lee. The cover to issue #1 is by Jim Lee and Scott Williams.

I'm giving it a shot, as much as I think Jim Lee is a terrible artist.

JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK

 John Constantine, Deadman, Shade the Changing Man and Madame Xanadu are Justice League Dark, a band of supernatural heroes united to stop the dark things the rest of the DCU does not see in JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #1, by Peter Milligan and artist Mikel Janin.

Stupid title.  I hate that John Constantine is going to be in a mainstream DC book.  I hate that they cancelled Madame Xanadu's book for this.  I hate that they cancelled Zatanna's book for this.  But I'm also mildly intrigued.

JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL

 A team of internationally-drafted superheroes fight each other and their bureaucratic supervisors as much as they do global crime in JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1 from writer Dan Jurgens and artist Aaron Lopresti. The cover to issue #1 is by Aaron Lopresti.

Curious, but not curious enough to pick this up.

LEGION LOST

 Seven heroes from the 31st century have traveled back to the present day. Their mission: Save their future from total annihilation. When the future tech they brought with them fails, they find themselves trapped in a nightmarish world and an ultimate struggle to survive. LEGION LOST #1 will be written by Fabian Nicieza and illustrated by Pete Woods, fresh off an acclaimed run of Action Comics.

Remember when we did this in the 90s?  Let's do it again.  But make it suck harder this time.

 LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES

In the 31st century, the Legion of Superheroes is reeling from the loss of seven of their finest — and trying desperately to keep their youngest recruits alive against a series of terrible new threats. LEGION OF SUPERHEROES #1 will be written by fan-favorite Legion writer Paul Levitz and illustrated by Francis Portela.

Dan DiDio's big selling point on this book was it was the one that was changed the least.  When you have to sell a book in that manner, isn't that saying something about the rest of the line?  This one I will still get.  For now.

 MEN OF WAR

The grandson of the original Sgt. Rock assumes the command of Easy Company, a team of crack ex-military men financed by a covert military contractor, as they brave the battle-scarred landscape carved by the DC Universe’s super-villains. MEN OF WAR #1 is contemporary military story fighting under modern conditions, and will be written by Ivan Brandon and illustrated by Tom Derenick.

Another book I'm curious about.  I will try it.

MISTER TERRIFIC

The world’s third-smartest man – and one of its most eligible bachelors – uses his brains and fists against science gone mad in MISTER TERRIFIC #1, the new series from writer Eric Wallace and artist Roger Robinson. The cover to issue #1 is by J.G. Jones.

Of the first announcement, this was the only book that didn't make me sad nor upset.  I think Eric Wallace will take this book, though, and turn it into pure shit.  Have you read his Titans?

NIGHTWING 

After a tenure as the Batman of Gotham, Dick Grayson resumes his mantle as Nightwing! As Dick embraces his identity, Haley’s Circus, the big top where he once performed with his family, returns to Gotham - bringing with it a history of murder, mystery and superhuman evil. Nightwing must confront friends and enemies from his past as he searches for the source of an even greater evil.

NIGHTWING will be written by Kyle Higgins with art duties handled by fan-favorite Eddy Barrows.

I'm glad Dick Grayson is back to being Nightwing.  I kind of like the red bat on his costume.  I have no idea who Kyle Higgins is.  I like that Dick was still Batman.  I'll try it.

OMAC

 A man loses control of his life as the omnipresent Brother Eye transforms him against his will into a powerful killing machine OMAC #1, written by DC Comics Co-Publisher Dan DiDio and co-written and illustrated by Keith Giffen and Scott Koblish.

This looks like it won't last six issues.  

RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS 

Batman’s former sidekick had put his past as The Red Hood behind him, when the reclusive Jason Todd finds himself unwillingly elected as the leader of an all-new team of outlaw vigilantes.

As The Red Hood once again, Jason Todd will lead this new team of antiheroes, including Green Arrow’s rejected sidekick Arsenal and Starfire, a former prisoner of intergalactic war.

RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS will be written by Scott Lobdell and illustrated by rising superstar artist Kenneth Rocafort.

Why does DC insist on pushing the Red Hood so hard?  He's a terrible character.  They've tried making him a hard ass villain.  That didn't work.  They tried making him a sympathetic anti-hero.  That failed as well.  Now they're giving him his own ill-conceived book?  Written by Scott Lobdell?  Where did they find that hack?  This book looks like it will last nine issues.

 RESURRECTION MAN

A cult favorite character returns in a new series written by his classic creative team of Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning. Joining them is JUSTICE LEAGUE: GENERATION LOST artist Fernando Dagnino. RESURRECTION MAN #1 is the story of a hero who wakes up with new powers each time he’s killed.

No one cared the first time.  No one will care this time.  Twelve issues max.

 THE SAVAGE HAWKMAN

Batman writer Tony Daniel will team up with artist Philip Tan (GREEN LANTERN: AGENT ORANGE, THE OUTSIDERS) for THE SAVAGE HAWKMAN #1. Carter Hall’s skill at deciphering lost languages has led him to a job with an archeologist who specializes in alien ruins – but will the doctor’s latest discovery spread an alien plague through New York City? No matter the personal cost, Carter Hall must don his cowl and wings and become the new, savage Hawkman to survive. The cover to issue #1 is by Philip Tan.

I love Hawkman.  I hate this costume.  I hate this new direction.  

STATIC SHOCK

 Virgil Hawkins has been gifted with incredible electrical powers. Adopting the persona of Static, he faces super-powered street gangs, raging hormones, homework, and girls in STATIC SHOCK #1, co-written by John Rozum and Scott McDaniel, with McDaniel also illustrating along with Jonathan Glapion.

Cancelled with issue 12

STORMWATCH 

Stormwatch is a dangerous super human strike force whose existence is kept secret from the world. Jack Hawksmoor and the rest of the crew look to recruit two of the deadliest super humans on the planet: Midnighter and Apollo. And if they say no? Perhaps the Martian Manhunter can change their minds. Featuring a surprising new roster, STORMWATCH #1 will be written by the critically-acclaimed Paul Cornell (Superman: The Black Ring, “Dr. Who”) and illustrated by Miguel Sepulveda.

This seems like such a bad idea, but I'm really kind of looking forward to it.  I don't know why.

 SUICIDE SQUAD

Harley Quinn! Deadshot! King Shark! They’re a team of death-row super villains recruited by the government to take on missions so dangerous – they’re sheer suicide! Who will be the first to crack under the pressure? Find out in SUICIDE SQUAD #1, written by Adam Glass (FLASHPOINT: LEGION OF DOOM) with art by Marco Rudy (THE SHIELD).

Seriously?

 SUPERBOY

They thought he was just a failed experiment, grown from a combination of Kryptonian and human DNA. But when the scope of his stunning powers was revealed, he became a deadly weapon. SUPERBOY #1 will be written by Scott Lobdell with art by R.B. Silva and Rob Lean.

Ugh.

 SUPERGIRL

Supergirl’s got the unpredictable behavior of a teenager, the same powers as Superman and none of his affection for the people of Earth. Writers Michael Green and Mike Johnson (Smallville, SUPERMAN/BATMAN) will team up with artist Mahmud Asrar to give a new take on the teenager from Krypton in SUPERGIRL #1.

Cover up her crotch just a little bit more and I actually like the costume.  Read the description of the book and you, too, will avoid it like the plague.

SUPERMAN

 What is Superman’s startling new status quo? How does it affect his friends, loved ones and his job at The Daily Planet? Find out in SUPERMAN #1, written by legendary comics creator George Perez (CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS, NEW TEEN TITANS and WONDER WOMAN) and illustrated by Jesus Merino.

Maybe.

 SWAMP THING

DC Comics embraces its dark side. On the 40th anniversary of the character’s creation, the New York Times bestselling writer of AMERICAN VAMPIRE, Scott Snyder, teams up with Yannick Paquette (BATMAN, INCORPORATED) to bring horror back to the DC Universe in SWAMP THING #1. For years, one man served against his will as the avatar of nature. And while he may have been freed of the monster, he’s about to learn the monster will never truly let go of him.

Like I said earlier about John Constantine being in a mainstream DC book, do we really need another DCU Swamp Thing book?  I'll give it a shot because I really like what Scott Snyder is doing.

 TEEN TITANS

Tim Drake is forced to step out from behind his keyboard when an international organization seeks to capture or kill super-powered teenagers. As Red Robin, he must team up with the mysterious and belligerent powerhouse thief known as Wonder Girl and a hyperactive speedster calling himself Kid Flash in TEEN TITANS #1, by Scott Lobdell and artists Brett Booth and Norm Rapmund.

Do the execs at DC really think comics of the 90s weren't the huge embarrassment they were?  This reeks of everything about 90s comics that I can't stand.  Hack writer.  Bad artist.  Horrible characters.  I've been a faithful Teen Titans reader my entire comics collecting life.  I can't believe I'm quitting the book.

VOODOO

Priscilla Kitaen has just found out she’s a monster. A half-alien hybrid, the woman known as Voodoo must confront the secrets of her past to make sense of the nightmare her life has suddenly become. VOODOO #1 will be written by Ron Marz with art by Sami Basri.

What the fuck is this shit?

WONDER WOMAN

New York Times bestselling writer Brian Azzarello, author of The Joker and 100 Bullets, teams up with the immensely talented artist Cliff Chiang (Neil Young’s Greendale) for WONDER WOMAN #1, an exciting new series starring the DC Universe’s greatest superheroine. The cover to issue #1 is by Cliff Chiang.

Another book I'm torn on.  I love Cliff Chiang.  LOVE him.  I'm not too hot on Brian Azzarello.  I've read more bad things from him than good.  I've been reading Wonder Woman in trade and will wait and hear about this before I commit to continuing.

Well, I guess I must be in a more optimistic mood than I thought right now.  I think I'm willing to (at this moment, it will change a dozen times this weekend) pick up about a dozen titles (at first) and look into another half dozen.  We'll see.