8.30.2009

A Weighty Issue

Anyone who has read this blog in the past knows that I obsess daily over my weight. I weigh myself every morning when I get up and every night when I go to bed. I am constantly watching what I eat, how much I eat, when I eat and why I eat. I don't always make the right choices and fret over them when I do falter. And trust me, I falter more than I'd like to admit. But I do try to maintain control over my diet.

Last summer we went to DisneyWorld (shocker!!) for vacation. It was a couple of weeks after I hit my goal weight of 190 lbs. I was adamant that I was going to keep my eating under control, make sure my exercise was increased to make up for whatever extra stuff I was going to eat (Barefoot Contessa Brownies... Damn you Kevin!!!) and just not over do it. I came home from that vacation six pounds heavier, which in the grand scheme of things isn't any big deal, but I was crushed. I mean, I'd just hit my ultimate goal and now I was back up. And for some reason, my body stopped listening to me. It took me six or seven weeks to drop those six pounds.

Now it's one year later and I've managed to maintain my goal weight. I'm up a pound or two one week, down a pound or two the next, but I'm there still. With the Florida vacation still in mind, and the Austin vacation coming up, I decided to pull a pre-emptive strike. I tried to lose five or six more pounds to give me a little wiggle room, knowing full well that I was going to eat like a king. And I lost the weight. But because I can't do anything right, I managed to set off my sciatic nerve during this. To the point that going out for extended walks like I do every day became impossible. About three or four weeks prior to the trip, I had to stop walking. Naturally, the panic set in, but I kept it under control. The extra weight I dropped slowly came back and I was back to square one, but without the exercise.

As I said before, going to Austin, I knew I was going to be eating and eating well. I weighed myself the morning I left for Texas and I was at 192.7 lbs. I was hoping and praying that I would come home under 200 lbs. If I made good choices, I could do it.

My diet in Austin differed completely from my diet at home. I think the only time I actually thought about what I was going to eat was my first lunch there. I got a chicken sandwich with fries.

So what that it had bacon on it, too. It's chicken, dammit. Healthy, right? But from there on out, I really stopped thinking about what I was going to eat. It's vacation, after all, and I should enjoy myself. And once I get home, it gives me two weeks to drop however much of the weight I gained that I can before the next vacation. (Okay, this had me in a panic. Two weeks is no time at all, especially considering it took a month and a half to recover from the last vacation.) But I did enjoy myself.


I had some Italian Ice at the ice cream festival.

I had the most delicious dark chocolate muffin with dark chocolate chip from the Taste No Evil Muffin Company.

Cherry Chocolate Chip pancakes for breakfast, though to tell the truth, they could have used more chocolate chips. Yes, I'm a filthy, dirty chocolate whore. Sue me!

Freddy makes awesome sausage, biscuits and gravy.

I discovered a whole new way to eat breakfast while in Texas. Breakfast tacos aren't really that well known in these parts. It's a great new way (for me, at least) to enjoy breakfast. I had a couple different variations, but this, The Don Juan from Juan In A Million, was by far the best.

I was unfamiliar with Migas before my visit. Even reading the menu, I was frightened. But talk about delicious. I really need to get over my irrational food issues. I'm missing out on a lot of stuff I wouldn't normally eat because of them.

Turkey from The Shady Grove.

The Yoga Instructor from Chedd's. It's turkey, provolone, avocado, spinach and Italian dressing on a multi-grain bread. Damn, that was good. I wish we had a Chedd's here. Gourmet grilled cheese? Yes please.

One of the burgers I enjoyed while in Austin. This one was from a place called Hut's. Two patties, two strips of bacon and lots and lots of cheese. The other place we got burgers at was called Chris Madrid's. I got the burger called the Cheddar Cheezy (Macho size). For $6.69, I got a burger the size of a plate. The bitch was so big that it was the last thing I ate that day and still didn't feel hungry.

I had a Mighty Cone. It's chicken, slaw and a deep fried avocado served in a tortilla wrap. So, so good.

My favorite meal in Austin was this. It's a chicken stuffed, deep fried avocado. It was AMAZING! I haven't stopped thinking about it all week.

Of course there was chocolate. This was a chocolate covered piece of bacon. I had to try it. It tasted really good, but to be honest, the chocolate kind of hid the flavor of the bacon. I could taste it in there, but it was so subtle.

There was so much more food, but I failed to get photographic evidence of it all. There were shrimp tacos, enchiladas, homemade milkshakes, homemade ice cream (two kinds!), BBQ....
And let's not forget about the boozing. I drank a lot. I'm not a drinker anymore, so it didn't take much for me to start feeling it, but that's not where I stopped. I'm still pretty much a lightweight and couldn't keep up with the others, but dammit, I tried. And tried. And tried. The calories from the beer alone should have been enough to make me fear stepping on the scale once I got home.

Even though I weigh myself when I get up and when I go to bed, I was too afraid to step on the scale the night I got home. I wasn't looking forward to the number I was going to see and wanted to at least have a good night of sleep before letting the depression set in. I tried to guess what my weight was going to be before I got on the scale. I was convinced it was going to be 205 to 207 lbs. That's how big my stomach felt. I would have been thrilled to see ANY number in the 100s, even 199.9. Tuesday morning I stepped on the scale. And my weight was.....

195.8

I had only gained 3.1 lbs during my entire trip. How that happened, I can't even begin to guess. I was constantly full the entire trip. I denied myself nothing. In fact, I had candy waiting for me when I got there and I never had the chance to open it up because I was full. I'm making up for it now by munching at work, though. Now that I've gotten back into my regular eating habits, I've been watching that number get smaller. On Saturday morning, I was actually 192.6, bringing me down (just barely) below my pre-Austin weight. But today I was back up to 193.3, which is still great considering I said my final farewell to my vacation by drinking the better part of a six pack last night. At the rate I'm going, I should hopefully be back down to 190 by the time my Disney vacation hits. And hopefully rebound from it as quickly as I did from Texas.


8.29.2009

Austin Is Magic

Austin Is Magic. I think that must have been said about ten times a day for each day I was in Texas. And it's true. Austin is magic. It was arguably the single best vacation I have ever been on. I don't know exactly why that is, but it just was. Maybe it's because it's the first solo vacation I've taken since Ken and I got together sixty-four years ago, maybe it was my amazing host family, maybe it was all the liquor or maybe it was seeing an old classmate from Ocean City High. All I know I had the best time.
Here I am, just off the plane. And I look it. I look tired and like I need to have my teeth whitened. By this point in the day, I should have been ready for a nap. The night before I slept for shit. Between the excitement of flying out in the morning and the panic of not being able to turn my brain off, I didn't sleep much. My flight was 6:30 am and set for arrival at 12:30 pm (in a different time zone even!). I managed to fall asleep on the plane for maybe 20 minutes. But I was too excited to be tired. I was in Austin, I was with Freddy and I was where the temperatures said it was summer. Upstate New York has been in perpetual April for months now. I was ready to soak up the big Texas sun.

We loaded up my bags and headed straight back to Chez Freddy. I have to tell you that this was the first time during the trip where I could feel my nerves kick in. I'm sure I was feeling them before this, but I was scared by what was waiting for me back at the house. Namely, Freddy's son, Adrian. I don't have much of any experience with kids. I don't have any in my life, I don't really know much about them except what I learned in my years of retail (and that's all bad stuff). I expressed this to Freddy in my pre-trip emails and he told me to stop being such a fucking retard. The kids love playing with their own shit, how could they not love me. I think that was meant as a compliment, at least that's how I took it. Anyway, I was warned that Adrian will keep his distance from me for maybe the first hour and by dinner he'll be wrestling his brother for the chance to sit next to me. Nathan, on the other hand, will be mine from the second he sets eyes on me. But that's not quite how things worked out. Adrian heard the jeep pull into the driveway and was there at the door waiting for us. And it took about nine seconds from seeing me until we were best friends.

Shortly after getting in the door, I was led to my Luxury Suite. And like any fine hotel, there was a welcome package waiting for me. Candy (dark chocolate Reese's... my FAVORITE!!!!!), a handy handbook/journal, a magazine all about Austin, soap and cum rag. All the bases covered. Oh, and I didn't get a picture of it, but the most amazing Welcome poster attached to my door, custom made by Adrian (and Freddy, I'm guessing.)

We only stuck around long enough to drop my bags and then it was off to lunch. I don't remember the name of the place we went to, but it was delicious. Adrian and I got to do some bonding, as you can tell from the photo.

After lunch, it was time for me to meet the fourth and final member of my host family, Nathan. He was in school, so we went to pick him up. Although I was told this would happen, I was still really shocked when we picked him up. We went into his classroom, he saw Daddy, ran to him and then made a beeline to me, so happy to see me. This kid has never met me before, but it didn't matter. I was really feeling humbled. It was at this point that I stopped feeling like a total fucking retard and realized that Freddy doesn't lead you astray. Ever.

We made a quick stop at the supermarket on the way home and picked up some necessities.

One of those necessities was beer and it wasn't long before Walter was feeling a little overserved. It didn't take much either. It's sad when you remember that it was almost exactly three years since you were last drunk. So, yeah, it didn't take much. Dinner followed shortly thereafter and then we headed out to meet up with our fabulous female counterparts.

Holly flew in from Minnesota to stay at the Tasty Jewelry Corporate Headquarters with President and CEO Diane. We headed over to the HQ to meet up with them, have cocktails and then head out. This is where the blurriness starts to set in. Between being on the go all day with no sleep and being overserved, my memory was due to fail. I know we hung out at the HQ for a little while and then we went somewhere, but that somewhere I don't recall. And we enjoyed some more tasty beverages. The ladies got some mac n' cheese, but I didn't want any for fear that it would soak up the alcohol. We made quite a few drunkie phone calls to all the podcasts we could find saved in our phones. And we called my darling Ricky. I wish I could remember a lot of what I said to him, but it's probably better that way. I think I had more fun on my first day of vacation than most people have in a full week. And I still had ten more days to go!

I won't go into as much detail about the rest of the trip, mainly because all the days started blurring into one and I'm sure I'm going to mess up the timeline. But some real highlights for me were:

Going to Schlitterbahn. I don't have any pics of that day yet, but Freddy bought a waterproof camera to take some shots. Hopefully there will be pictures soon!
The intervention we scheduled for Holly. There was no way in hell I was going to let her go home with a toothless, homeless wino again. No way!


Spending time at Barton Springs. I went twice. First time as a group activity with Freddy, Jed, the kids, Holly and Diane. Second time was a date with Diane. What a beautiful place. The water was chilly, but great to get out in. I spent three days in Texas parading around without a shirt on. For me, that's huge. I have a lot of body issues, most of which are in my head and nowhere else, but I managed to shut them off while in Texas. Even the issues I have that are evident to those with eyes (the dreaded back hair... the arms that are too skinny for my frame...) didn't really bother me. I forgot how much I like to go swimming until Barton Springs.

And speaking of Diane, I was so excited to finally meet her in person. I still have a lot of remorse for not being able to make it down to NYC when she was here a few months ago. I got to make up for it in Texas, though.

Of course, drinking was a huge highlight for me. I haven't done that in so long. I felt like I was 22 again, if only for a week and a half.
I did karaoke. Me. For real. Now you need to know that not only would I never, ever do karaoke in my "real" life, I would NEVER, EVER consider GOING to karaoke. But a little booze and a lot of support from my friends go a long way.

Seeing Gregg and Melanie again. The three of us have been friends online for the better part (if not more) of a decade. We finally got the chance to meet in person three years ago (and Gregg was the last person to get me drunk, fyi) in Illinois when we all attended the memorial service of another dear friend of ours. As an aside, Gregg used to live here in Albany and we frequented the same places all the time, but we didn't know each other. It wasn't until after he moved to Texas that we became friends.

Meeting Kim and Mandie in person. Kim I've gotten to know mostly through Facebook and Mandie moreso on Twitter. Both ladies are fucking great!
Joe! So tall. So pretty. So incredibly nice. I didn't think it would be possible to adore him more.

I like to go to comic shops when I travel. I order the bulk of my comics online, but exploring new shops is a lot of fun for me. Austin has probably the single best comic shop I have ever seen. First off, the place is HUGE. They have the single best selection of new stuff and back issues I've ever experienced. I could spend days in there and not stop finding new things. To be honest, I was a little overwhelmed once I got to looking. I'm forever grateful to Jed for bringing me. I only spent about $50, though I could have easily spent 10 times that. The only problem would be how do I get all the loot back home with me.

Kay! I started stalking her on Facebook in preparation for my trip. All I knew about her was Freddy worships the ground she walks on (at least in my world that's how it is). So I started emailing her asking for help in finding the perfect hostess gifts for Freddy, Jed and the boys. We only got to spend a little time together on Saturday and quite frankly, it wasn't nearly enough. Next visit, I'm demanding more Kay time.

Hanging out with Jesus.

I know this is going to sound dumb, but I think my favorite parts of my whole trip were the quiet times at home when Freddy and I got to chit chat about this, that and nothing. He's got a great back deck where we sat out at night. Or we sat on the couch and talked. Granted, Freddy did more than his fair share of talking, but he's absolutely fascinating to listen to. And he knows so much about so many different things. Hell, I was amazed at the tour of Austin he gave me because he knows so much about the history of the town, specifics about the buildings and the areas and, well, everything.


A very close second favorite (VERY, VERY close) was meeting and getting to know the boys. Like I said earlier, I have no experience with little kids. None. I don't have any in my life, at least on a regular basis. I absolutely fell in love with these two kids. Simply put, they're amazing. I had so much fun playing with them, hanging out with them and getting to know them. And I'm surprised how much I learned about myself from just being in their presence. For a while now, I was thinking that something was missing in my life and was wondering if having a child would fill that void. While it's possible it might, I really don't think I was cut out to be a father. I know I have enough love in my heart for a child, but parenting is a lot of hard work and I don't think I'm strong enough of a man to do what's right in the way of raising a kid. But I think I would make a kick ass uncle. I just wish I had a kid or two in my everyday life to spoil the shit out of.

My original plan was to keep a more active journal of what was going on while I was in Texas and make daily posts. It was a good idea, but it just never happened. One little blogpost and that was it. So this is going to have to make up for the lack of recent posts.

P.S. I just got this picture and I absolutely LOVE it. I think the Magic of Austin really shines through in it.

8.26.2009

Behind

I hate that I've been neglecting my blog. It's not that I've been doing it on purpose. I had every intention of posting all the while I was in Austin, but after that one short post, I just didn't find the time. Austin was an INCREDIBLE vacation and one I will never, ever forget. I've been trying to play catch up since getting home Monday night and am finding time to be a precious commodity. I really want to talk about my trip before all of the details fade, but tonight isn't going to be that night. Instead, I'm just going to embarrass the shit out of myself. The following video stars me. In Austin. I guess I'm an official member of the Austin Live Music Scene now. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have the best time up on that stage. I still can't believe that's me. Really. Hopefully tomorrow I'll post some pictures and talk a little about my trip. Until then, may I present "The Rain."


8.17.2009

Very Short Post

So tired. It's 2:45 am when I'm writing this (though my body says it's
3:45) and I'm just going to bed. I was out with Freddy, Diane and
Holly tonight, up to no good and having a blast. Three days in to my
Austin trip and it's been an unreal and unbelievable good time. I've
met some new people whom I just adore. I've seen people I've met
before. I've been treated like a king and I'm so very grateful. I have
never had a vacation experience like this before. Nowi just need to
get to bed and hopefully start catching up on My sleep.

Sent from Babs, my iPhone

8.10.2009

Not Pissed

What a difference a day can make. Yesterday was just absolutely terrible. I was in a downward spiral that I just couldn't seem to pull myself out of. At least I knew it and maybe that helped pull me out of it. I don't know. But today was a much, much better day. I found my usual spirit come back, I had motivation, I was just in a generally good mood. And for a Monday? Whoa!

My Austin trip is less than 100 hours away. I found myself with a little bit of shortness of breath this morning when I realized it. It surprised me only because I thought I shook all that crap already. Guess not. And if it happened today, it's going to happen tomorrow and the following day and so on until I hyperventilate in front of Freddy upon arrival. That's not my plan, but I shouldn't be surprised when it happens.

I've been debating taking the laptop to Texas with me for the last couple of weeks and I've decided against it. I'm not going to sit and play online for the week plus. I'm sure I'll have some downtime, but I'm not planning on it. I can update my blog via Babs, my iPhone, but I hate typing anything too long on that. Any updates through it will probably be kind of short.

I've got stuff to do before bedtime. Wish me luck that I actually motivate!

8.09.2009

Repost

I originally uploaded this video to YouTube, but they aren't happy with it anymore. They've stripped the audio, those bastards, so I'm uploading it here. It's from last summer in NYC.


video

Pissed

I'm kind of pissed off at myself right now. I've spent the entire day having a great big pity party for myself. And not for any one good reason. It was a bunch of little things that all added up to it and now that I've had a chance to work through it, I feel incredibly annoyed with myself. When I get into one of these moods, I mentally check out and the whole world could collapse around me and I wouldn't notice. Today I had a bunch of things I wanted to get done. I did manage to do the last two loads of laundry and go grocery shopping. What fun. But the rest of the day I spent sitting in front of the computer accomplishing nothing. Well, I did get my high score for the week on Bejeweled Blitz, but that's my only accomplishment. How sad is that?

I think this pity party started yesterday. We went out and loaded up on cupcakes yesterday morning. We were going over to our friends Sean & Jeffrey's house and we were in charge of something sweet. There's a bakery just up the street we've never been to, but I've heard great things about. We investigated and found an assortment of cupcakes that made me drool. We decided that that's what we were going to bring. And because we had never been there before, we bought two extras, to try out in the car. They also gave us two more cupcakes. So in the car, we each scarfed down two of these things. They were sooooooo damn good. So good. And that should have been it for me, but sometimes I misplace my self control. Later, at Sean & Jeffrey's, I wolfed down two more after the fantastic lunch that was served. So today I've been focusing on all the cupcakes I ate yesterday rather than the great time I had or all the new comics I brought home.

Weighing in today didn't help. While I weighed in at 192, which is right in my goal area, I can't help but think that I'm 6 pounds heavier than I was last week. That's a huge increase in 7 days and that's got me down. It shouldn't, though. I know I'm being a freak about it.

And lugging comic boxes yesterday didn't help me one little bit. I woke up this morning with some back pain, which also fueled the fire. It's so easy for me to let things get to me. I hate when I allow myself to feel defeated. It's made me lose an entire day of my life.

Tomorrow is going to be a better day. I'll be back to work, I'll have my weekday structure and I'll get back on track. Not only that, but I'll be one step closer to vacation, which has been ruling my life for the last month and a half.

8.07.2009

Milestones

I hit two major milestones in my life this week. Well, major to me, at least.

The first one didn't come without any drama, though. I paid off my car. I know that's not really a major milestone in the grand scheme of things, but to me, it's pretty big. It's the first brand new car that's I've ever paid off. It's not the first new car I've had, though. Until this car, my previous four or five cars were all leases. When it came time to turn in my last lease, laws in New York had changed and most dealers were no longer leasing cars. That eventually changed back to the way it was, but left me little choice. So I purchased the car I was intending on leasing. I was actually still about 3 1/2 payments away from getting it paid off, but all the overtime I've been working made it possible to just get it done with. I called and got the payoff quote for my car, which was valid until August 2nd. On July 23rd I mailed out my final payment. And then forgot about it. A couple days ago, I decided to check on the status of my payment and according to Chase's website, no payment had been received yet. It was over a week and surely they had my payment. I checked again the following night and they did get my payment and applied it to my account. The only problem was they applied $174.13. I don't know what that number is, but it certainly wasn't what I mailed in. I decided to give it one more day and then check. Nothing had changed. They still had me down for paying a fraction of what I sent in. I checked the bank and my check had cleared. So a phone call in got me a little further. They wanted faxes of the check and whatever else I had to prove I paid them. They said it was going to take until the 14th to investigate, which was all fine and dandy, but I had another payment due before then. If I didn't get a payment in, it would leave a mark on my credit. I decided to wait it out and actually, by that evening, the situation was straightened out. My actual payment was applied and the other one was taken off. So I now own my car. Kind of. You see, my payoff quote was only valid until August 2nd. Since they dragged their heels on applying my payment, I now owe a little more interest. My new balance, which I intend to send a check to cover after I finish this blog post, is five cents. Because I'm a passive aggressive cunt.

My other milestone is much more significant to me. This week marked both my three year anniversary of the diet that changed my life and the one year anniversary of hitting my goal weight. August 4, 2006 was the day I was horrified to find out I hit the 300 pound mark. I swore to myself that I would never, EVER see 300 pounds, but I did. Nothing had ever motivated me to really diet before. Over the years I would try to eat better, eat less, exercise more, but nothing ever stuck. As long as I wasn't 300 pounds, I was fine. My scale at home was telling me I was a little less (though not much less) than 300 pounds, so I knew I was safe. But the doctor's scale told me a different story. And that was all the motivation I needed to make a change. The first year, I lost 66 pounds. I remember hitting that first anniversary and being amazed at what I had accomplished. That was more than a pound a week. My original weight loss goal was to lose 100 pounds, but as I got closer and closer to hitting that number, it didn't seem good enough for me. I wanted to be LESS than 200 pounds. I wanted to be 190. I thought that would give me enough wiggle room that if I ate something I shouldn't, I would still be less than 200. And by the second anniversary, I was exactly at 190 pounds. Again, the sense of accomplishment I felt was nothing short of amazing. I have never been prouder of myself. Until now.

For the last year, I have managed to maintain my weight. If I said it's been an easy year, I'd be lying my ass off. It's not been. Maintaining my weight is hard. I still have to watch everything I eat. It's not like I hit my goal and now I can resume to the way I was eating before. I still have to be aware of everything I put in my mouth. Granted, now that I'm where I want to be, I can be a little more lax and have a bowl of ice cream without feeling guilty if I want (though, to be honest, I've yet to have a bowl of ice cream that didn't come with a huge side of guilt) or have some candy or whatever. But I still have to count my calories, watch my carbs... all that bullshit. Next week I go away to Austin and I'm kind of scared about my eating habits. It's very easy to control myself when I'm at home, but when I'm away, I don't know what to expect. The next five weeks are going to be the toughest test I've faced. After Austin, I come home for a short break before I head out on vacation again. Last year I gained six pounds at Disney World and it took me about six weeks to drop that. I can only imagine what a double dose of vacation is going to do to my anorexic shape.
Before

After

Before

After

Before

After

8.02.2009

Weekend Round Up

Okay, here we go with another post of random crap floating around in my head.

* I hit a new all-time lowest adult weight today. I rocked the scale at 186.6 lbs this morning. Again, I don't know how I did this. I've been less restrictive with my diet in hopes of bumping that number up a couple of pounds. I've been doing absolutely no exercise. Zero. Zilch. Zippo. I even did a little drinking this weekend, something I rarely do. I think it's been over a year since I've had an adult beverage. But whatever I'm doing, I'm keeping the weight down. This won't go on for very much longer, though. For one reason, I gorged myself at dinner tonight. And then polished it off with a ginormous bowl of ice cream. For another...

* ...Austin is DAYS away. Twelve and counting. I know there's going to be lots of food around. Lots of food. I know my awesome host has been planning out menus and restaurants and all that stuff. I secretly think his plan is to fatten me up enough to be too big to fly so I can't go home, not that that's necessarily a bad thing. I'm so looking forward to going to Texas. More than I can say. And seeing all these people. Her, her, her and her, him, him and him among others. Just getting away for a little while is something I really need. I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but this is my first vacation away from Ken in the fifteen years we've been together. It's about time. He's gone away without me, but I've never done it myself. These next twelve days are going to drag.

* This weekend was my 25 year high school reunion. I've never been to one of my reunions, and probably with good reason. I really haven't ever had any interest in going. I was never one of the popular kids, never had a tremendous amount of friends. I've kept in touch with virtually no one I went to school with. Those that I have have mostly been from the class of '85, not '84. After the last reunion five years ago, my friend Maria (from the class of '84) gave me plenty of shit and told me there was no way I wasn't going to the next. So for the last five years I've had it in the back of my head that I'm going. I made plans to meet Maria and her husband John and we'd go up together. Unfortunately, plans changed slightly and she had some stuff to take care of just prior to going, so we decided to just meet there. I arrived first and my anxiety went through the ceiling. I lingered around and knew no one. Sure, I recognized a bunch of people, but I didn't know them back then. I grabbed a drink and waiting until I recognized someone. I heard someone say "Norman!" and I looked around, knowing that one of my good friends from high school was named Norman. Sure enough, I knew someone at last. So we chatted for a little bit, I met his wife and had a nice time. I was awkward as all get out (shocker), but I'm glad we talked. Then it was time to mingle for a little bit more. I noticed a woman doing the same thing as I, kind of wandering and not talking to anyone. I didn't feel as bad. Finally, Maria arrived and my anxiety dropped considerably. I had a crutch. The cool thing about Maria is she knows EVERYONE. So I got to talk to people I didn't know but knew of. And it was nice. Eventually, the wandering woman came up to Maria, naturally. And we hung out all night long. Turns out this woman, Kim, and I are Facebook friends already. We talked and turns out we have a lot in common. I didn't recognize her until I saw her yearbook picture. She looks nothing like she did back then. She was cute then, she's cute now, but not in an 80s way! I eventually ran into a few people I knew from back then, one of which currently lives about two miles from me. At one point during the evening, I looked up and saw someone I had hoped would be there, a woman named Diane. I have nothing but fond memories of Diane. We didn't hang out really, but we shared classes and she was always so nice to me. It took most of the rest of the night for me to work up the courage to go talk to her (well, it's not that bad. She was always what looked like in intense conversations all night. I was mostly waiting for a break) but I'm so glad I did. She's just as amazing now as she was then. I really need to send her an email when I get a chance.

The reunion was set from 7 until 11. At 12:45, I was one of the last people out. Some took the party to a local bar, but since it was nearly 1am and I still had an hour drive ahead of me, I begged out.

Maria and Kim really wanted me to come down on Saturday night, too. They were going to crash the reunion dinner after the fact. I really considered going, but I was feeling pretty run down all day Saturday. We wouldn't be going until 10pm and the way I was feeling didn't make it possible. I really do hope I can get down and see both Maria and Kim sometime in the near future. I had such a good time. I'm really glad I went. You know, I've been trying to change my way of thinking. I have plenty of regret in my life (I think I've said in the past) and I'm going to gain new regrets in the future. Most of my regrets are for things I wish I did, but didn't. If I'm going to regret something, I want to regret doing it or trying it, not the other way around. It's so easy for me to shut the world out and become a hermit. It's something I'm very comfortable with. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but it can't be my entire life.

* We almost had a free KitchenAid mixer for whoever wanted one. Ken decided he wanted to make homemade banana bread today. Where that came from I have no clue. So he got his mixer out and proceeded to take the one attachment off. And tried. And tried. And tried. He spent 20 minutes trying to get the attachment off and got more and more frustrated with each minute. He called me in to help and I couldn't do it. It's been maybe three years since he's used it (seriously) and that thing was stuck. After about a half hour, he gave up, brought it out to the front porch and was going to throw it out on Thursday (trash day). When he gets to that level of frustration, there's no talking to him or reasoning with him. I try to keep my patience (and usually fail) and for some reason, I did today. When he was safely back in the kitchen, I started playing with the mixer and after about five minutes, I got the attachment unstuck and off. Crisis averted.

* Top Chef Masters didn't record for me on Wednesday. WTF?

* I bought the Green Lantern dvd that came out this weekend. I was psyched to find the last copy in Best Buy that had the free action figure with it. Yay me. But I didn't get a chance to watch it yet. I was really tired and headachey last night, so I just went to bed instead. Hopefully sometime this week, though. I hear it's really good. I bought the two disc version. I'm a sucker for all the extras, plus my boyfriend Geoff Johns is supposedly in some of the extras.

* I have a sinking feeling that this week is going to be a L O N G , L O N G week. I'm praying it flies.